Do Not Presume To Tell Me How To Love You
The difference of who you were to me then
to who you are now...
Lies in the words you use to explain how you feel.
I used to be a beautiful energy you were drawn to,
now I "was" a safe spot to explore the attraction of energies,
where your heart could not be hurt.
You were never safe for me.
You were a gamble I bet my soul on.
You were not a replacement for a vacancy I needed filled.
You were the destiny I was drawn too.
Do not diminish what was real to me.
It is enough that today you are realm of broken and distant,
the being in whom I was willing to risk it all for.
If you presume to tell me how I feel for you,
you rob me of even the honesty of the pain.
This "you" though, she was never you.
If this cruelty of you is you, I did not know her.
Perhaps the love misplaced, and there fore this pain is farce too.
I loved you. Not a void. Not a pretend image.
It was as real then as the loss was afterwards.
I just did not know yet every other part.
I can keep loving the whole of you, good and bad,
but I can not keep sacrificing my heart
to one who will never return love the same way.
Copyright © Tara Jennings | Year Posted 2020
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