Did You Say Calf

I was a record producer and a star-maker. The call came in on a Tuesday, a deal-breaker. The wife cannot come, but can you sign a calf? I thought I had heard him wrong, but not by half. Did you say calf? I asked the guy named Larry McDad. Yes, he said, she is the most gorgeous one we have ever had. I was now confused. A bovine? A cow? A mooer? Yes, and I promise, I will scrape up all of her manure. “I am a record producer,” I told him. “Does this calf sing?” “You are a promoter,” he told me. “This baby has zing.” I made the appointment for the very next day. He was right. This little beauty promptly blew me away. She started out with “over the rainbow” and she was as good as Judy had ever been. She sang six more songs just as well, and we put her back into the pen. “How do I pay her?” I asked Farmer McDad. “she likes straw and feed,” he said. “Does that make you mad?” “And you get a percent?” I guessed right away. “Yes, “ he agreed. “She can start singing today.”