Designation Designer
Good morning you good people
Welcome to Designer School
Where we carefully teach you
How to manipulate life’s fools.
Following the success of
Jeans with Designer Holes
Our next project will be
Shoes with porous soles.
So the water seeps in
So the feet don’t sweat,
Only disadvantage being
Feet get cold and wet.
We are, naturally,
Working on that
Waterproof socks
For the silly prat
Who, with fashion
Well and truly to the fore,
Doesn’t bother to buy
Waterproof shoes anymore.
They’re not in fashion
They’re not in style
And wet feet warm up
After just a little while.
You are the Designer
Trained to mix it
Doesn’t really matter if
In doing so you unfix it.
A frock is just a tube
With holes in correct locations
But billions has been earned by
Making the slightest variations.
A little bit of cheek
Is all it takes
And a catwalk of models
As thin as garden rakes
You will find it easier
With every further attempt
To treat the gullible public
With disdain and contempt.
Just remember dear designer
That age old rhyme
About fooling most people
For most of the time.
If you still don’t believe that
Take heart from the story
Of poverty stricken people
Going out and voting Tory.
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