Death Wish

Death Wish.
Do we have them?
Are they real?
How do you get one?

Death Wish.
Does it make sense?
Is it what we strive for?
Is it a good thing?


Death Wish.
I thought only crazy people thought like that.
Death wish?
That's nuts!
Who would want death?
But then I had a bad wreck.

I remember thinking, "God, I've had a great life, I know
I'm going to die, but it's okay."
Only it wasn't.
Because I walked away.
And believe it or not, and I would have
never believed this if it had not
happened to me....

I felt disappointed,
because in one split second I expected
to die; and my abject instant post-non-death- feeling 
was SEVERE disappointment. 


Death Wish means to me something
totally different after that wreck.
It means that my spirit self, my true
self, my self that will go back to God or
the source, or the light, knows that there
is something glorious waiting.
Death Wish for me is okay.
Comforting even.
I never thought I could feel that way,
but I do.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2018

Poem

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Gauthier Avatar
April 3, 2018 at 10:08 PM
Awesome powerful poem, Caren. Love how you described your life altering ah-ha moment.
Krutsinger Avatar
April 3, 2018 at 10:28 PM
Thank you, Line. This happened in 1998, and so much of these feelings are still grabbing me by the hairs and throwing me down to stomp on me.
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