Dear Diary

Dear Diary It's the 13th June today It should be a Friday An unprecedented day Dark as my mood You see diary dear Today she asked me What's your greatest fear? For awhile I sat quiet Debating if she deserved a reply Deep in the recess In the abyss of my mind I could feel emotions resurface Fighting their way to my conscience Colliding, in their haste to escape I remembered why I had shut them out Why for years they were prisoners I will not allow it dear diary I will not remember Fear is not attractive About it, words I cannot mince I will not phrase or utter memories of it Lest my mind obeys And tribes of the forgotten tumble into my head I will not remember my fears And when she asks What are you afraid of? How can I say - being alone When I know her questions will dig deeper in my subconscious In a place I have long left Where I have fought to escape A place I will not return to... Diary, Loneliness is a dark place Nothing dwells there but emptiness Layers and layers of sooted cold slime There is no exit door. Once you are in, It envelopes you there, clinging to your very you It will not let you go It hates to be alone So I tell you, I cannot go back I will not explore my mind for thruths I'm not ready to deal with I will not open a portable to which I cannot leave at will I don't want loneliness as a friend She clutches and chokes you With her anxiety and worry Eventually you lose yourself As you try in vain not to be like her © 2018 Moliehi Molupe Shared from Google Keep