Dear dad
Dear Father,
I’m disappointed in you,
you’ve let me down,
a shadow cast over my heart.
You say you love me, sure you do,
but love is more than words,
more than the fleeting touch of a phone call,
once a month, if that.
You call me, once in a blue moon,
and if I don’t pick up,
your anger flares, a wildfire of accusation.
Dear Father,
do you see the irony?
A connection so fragile,
yet your expectations are mountains,
unmovable, towering, cold.
Dear Father,
I’m afraid,
afraid that my wedding dress,
a symbol of dreams and new beginnings,
won’t have your presence to bless it.
Afraid that the aisle I walk,
a path of hope,
will be lined with ghosts of what could have been.
You’ve missed so much,
moments that shaped me,
laughter and tears,
victories and fears.
Your absence a gaping void,
a chasm I’ve tried to fill with fragments of memory,
with whispers of your voice,
echoes of what once was.
Dear Father,
you’ve let me down,
a disappointment that clings like mist,
permeating my being,
seeping into my dreams.
I wanted a hero, a guide,
but you gave me distance,
space that grew and grew,
until it swallowed us whole.
Love is more than a word,
more than a duty call,
it’s presence, it’s care,
it’s being there,
in the moments that matter,
in the silence that speaks volumes.
Dear Father,
I’ve tried to reach you,
bridge the gap with hope,
with forgiveness,
but the walls are high,
the bridges burnt.
Your love, if it exists,
is a fleeting shadow,
a wisp of smoke,
intangible, elusive.
And I am left,
with the ruins of expectation,
the rubble of unmet dreams.
Dear Father,
I wanted you to be my rock,
my anchor in the storm,
but you are a ship adrift,
lost in the sea of your own making.
I’m disappointed,
hurt,
but still, I hope,
a fragile flame in the darkness.
Hope that one day,
you’ll see,
that love is more than a call,
more than a word.
Dear Father,
I wanted a dance,
a moment of joy,
but the music plays,
and you are not here.
Dear Father,
I’m afraid,
afraid of the future,
of the dreams that may never come true,
because you are not there to share them.
But I am strong,
stronger than you know,
and though you’ve let me down,
I will rise,
I will shine,
I will be the love I needed from you.
Dear Father,
this is my truth,
a letter unsent,
a plea unheard.
But still, I write,
still, I hope,
for a future where your love,
is more than a shadow,
more than a word.
Dear Father,
I’m disappointed,
but I will not be defined,
by the love you failed to give.
I will be whole,
I will be free,
and I will find the love,
within me.
Copyright © Ariana Pataki | Year Posted 2024
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