Dead
Dead
Swear to God you want me dead.
You run your middle finger up and down my spine.
Too far gone to smile so I cry and apologize.
The clouds are dark but we’re moving on.
I’m not waiting on the shelf…
You hide like I knew you would.
You don’t care if I’m alive or dead as long as I don’t become a threat.
Cellophane wrapped up.
Just about to end everything.
We ran our courses, going no where.
Idk why I’m still here.
And the beating of your heart is making me bleed from within.
I only fall if it kills me; I have a death wish, this time bury me six feet below you.
No time for fair wells and no time for goodbyes.
I can’t be the person you want me to be.
Break me until I dissolve; I was just a distraction.
Til I finally prove it.
There will be no white flag above my door.
I can feel my heart growing colder and colder.
Ever since I met you baby, I’ve been lost in the way.
You made me feel like I am not enough for you.
And that’s okay because you were never mine in the first place.
You’ll fade away.
You wanna hear my last words.
You know I been dreaming lately.
Keep my eyes closed so I sleep the sadness away.
You say it’s my fault; it’s the aftermath of yours.
Been forgetting how to breathe.
I can’t bear to live without you but I’ll die if I stay.
You will bleed out, you will scream out.
When the final chapter writes.
It’s a losing battle.
And now I’m jaded.
Nothing is ever enough.
Nothing but misery and loneliness under this ground.
Dead and cold, I wish I was.
Copyright © Katlin Bouse | Year Posted 2024
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