Days Like Today

Somedays I feel so low, like I'm drowning and can't get air My chest hurts and regardless of how deep the breathe It's not enough air Suffocating in misery and sinking into thoughts of inadequacy Pondering if I can make it another day or will I succumb to my self hate Tears stream down my cheeks as I lay alone in despair She hates me even after making the many sacrifices requested Treated like a leper, quarantined. No touching or kissing, only hugs are allowed. Pushing on and faking it to protect our kin The ignore and disregard Is this the life I want, or imagined even Distraught is not strong enough a word. How can I move forward when my love has already moved on Isolated. Abandoned. Despised. Forsaken. Wondering where it went wrong Today begins another nightmare And again I ask, am I strong enough to make it If the good lord looks down upon me and believes me unworthy of his blessings, I suppose I'm only worthy of mischief and should end it all If I wake up tomorrow I've made it another day. But I refuse to be the darkness in my life, because in my soul I shine like diamonds do If I get out of this rough, I can expose it maybe I can allow others to see my inner beauty too.