Dashed

I wish to be a priest no more My heart drags the floor Wearing black Keeps sin from the attack But my shield starts to crack Life has wore me down Observe my frown Faith stumbles As life crumbles Thinking I cannot go on Life is taking so long Believe dashed by pain And the stain I'm lost My heart pays the cost God ignores my cry Rain falls from the sky Tears fall from the eye This world is beyond me From my mind never to be free All the pain that there be Life get the best Think I have failed the test Hungry, so cold Have I let my soul be sold Maybe it is because I'm so old I do not know But it is starting to show The world I wanted to save Is leading me to an early grave So many hold life in distain Sitting here in the rain Wracked by pain Seem no more do I care Nothing is fair Going to an adult care home No longer can I roam And alone I do not wish to die For me, there is no one to cry For I am already dead Lost in my head Love, not real The pain that will not heal I pray Loose what I wish to say Feel empty inside Nowhere left to hide Must confide Hurts really bad I feel sad Nothing left for me That I see Life has got the better Lost in the words of an old letter They can make my body stronger But I do not wish for longer Borrowed time Living my life through each rhyme Life has been wasted Love tasted And lost I now pay the cost Whished for so much Somewhere I feel out of touch Gave away all I have had Why am I sad Life wins Who is with no sins I fall Life seems to stall Leaning against this wall Struggle to stand No one can understand The words I say Can no longer pray I feel Like I'm ill My body dragging My soul sagging But why can I not just give in The world did win But this inner fire Burns ever hire Even without the desire My will refuses to bend Hiding from the wind Afraid to step into the world I see What should become of me From life I wish to flee I wait for my ride Life lied I cried