Cursed
Sometimes I feel cursed,
Born alone, live life alone, die alone.
But in which of that is worse?
Born alone but its not like you care or know.
Between living life alone and dying alone… You pass through life day to day,
You love and you lost but the pain always stays.
One bad experience shouldn’t kill your belief,
But many a heartbreak will surely make it cease….. any love you have left to offer.
You don’t beg, plead, or anything of the sorts, the hurt that’s left—add it all up and you have the sum,
The pain that never leaves will start to make you feel numb.
You don’t know what to do or how to feel, what to think or what to say,
But you cry yourself to sleep each night wondering what you did for things to turn out this way…
In the silence you can hear your heart slowly sinking little by little to the pit of your gut,
Knots wrapping all around adding pressure and pain to something so fragile.
You can hear the cracking every second and feel to what depth, and it’s crumbling to pieces and burning so hot it is turning to ash, and you feel stuck….. paralyzed…
So broken you can hardly move, and you don’t know what to do.
Questions in your head, a jumbled mess,
Cant sort them only worry and stress.
Alone—you are alive but get too lonely and don’t have to hide,
In a relationship you’re just as lonely, but you let out a little bit of crazy at a time.
Which is better, which is worse?
No matter how you look at it, humans are all just frickin jerks!
What can I do to turn back time before this started, before I died?
This might be the one to make me give up on love… on that life,
All you ever get is heartbreak and lies.
I feel confused and numb,
Question is …. Is this where I call it quits and be done?
So yeah… sometimes I feel cursed,
So what’s next to knock me down and feel worse?
Copyright © Brandi Gray | Year Posted 2017
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