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Costly Reprieve

Costly Reprieve
by Jason Williams

A hypnotic ritual
Holding utensil to flame
It hurts to see the bubbling
But I’ve no one else to blame

I do not care for anyone
I only care for me
About the next fix to get
That's all that I can see

Cotton brushes against skin
The tourniquet stretches tight
My despair will soon be over
I’ll have peace all through the night

An artificial cure I know
Needle piercing flesh and vein
Get me through the night I pray
I have to end the pain

Escape despair is what I seek
By any means that I can find
Even if it's just for hours,
I leave despair behind

When I wake I will be sick
I’ll be broke, I cannot win
I’ll find a way to make it
Then I’ll do it all again.

Is this the life I wish to lead?
Will I ever again be me?
Is there a life beyond repair?
Will I ever again be free?

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White Wolf Date: 2/18/2017 1:55:00 AM Hi, Jason! Darren directed me to this poem! Having lived a rather shady past myself, I found this quite poignant indeed! Great pen my friend. Login to Reply Jason Williams Date: 2/18/2017 3:11:00 AM I'm glad you were able to glean some perspective from it. I guess I've always been rather poignant when it comes to my past mistakes. Keeps me humbled.

Claudia Polydoro Date: 11/30/2016 4:44:00 AM This is a strong poem, and it's such a hard subject to talk about. Great poem. (((Hugs))) :* Login to Reply Jason Williams Date: 12/4/2016 6:30:00 AM Thanks Claudia. I value the support of friends like you. (((Hugs)))

Tim Smith Date: 11/29/2016 11:49:00 AM The world of addiction is a vicious cycle. I wish you well and remember your loved will always be there not just in the good time...very strong poem Login to Reply Jason Williams Date: 12/4/2016 6:27:00 AM Thanks Tim for your kind words. It's a tough subject to write about, but it helps to remind me of why I left that life behind Darren White Date: 11/30/2016 5:12:00 AM Love is there :) And indeed, not only on good times!

Darren White Date: 11/28/2016 12:16:00 PM Hey honey. That is a hard thing to write about, and it is brave and so honest. Thank you for sharing it, and btw it is a wonderful poem! <3 Login to Reply Jason Williams Date: 11/29/2016 10:45:00 AM You're right, it is difficult to write about this topic, and even more so to share it with the world. Even though I'm in recovery, the stigma is still there. Glad you liked it baby boo. <3