Connection Rejection
Coming out of my prison door
Accompanied by my companion
Not connected in any way
....but I knew him
Barren wasteland, behind
Freedom beckons my will
I do NOT stop for direction
But run headlong into the chill
Wrapped tightly in failed attempts
To connect to anyone with value
I struggled in the comfort
To rest in the battle
I came to myself....
I had traded lock down
For house arrest
No movement possible
In my shiny, white, vest
........of broken threads
"A little help, please"
My companion touched my white
The shredded hope fell at his feet
As he directed me to the right where I would find the light
Door after door
Window upon window
Always passing through
Never knowing the compass of victory
Til I have done all I can do"
....to stand
Stand moment after eternal moment
In nothingness....learning to trust
Calming down desire
Singing lullabies to lust
Silence is far worse than the stand
The incessant push to understand
.....something....anything..............nope, still NOTHING!!!
How can one connect to authority
Without yielding up self
Carrying out their desires and commands
And leaving yours to collect dust bunnies on a knick knack shelf
...........stupid knick knacks.......stop running.........you might break.........the pretties
Today....at this very moment
I understand things I didn't in my past
I see the dark laid out before me
Shall I stop my flow...to ponder
Or continue in my sorrow, believing I will know more in the 'morrow
Accepting that my yielded connections will have no more erections
..........to wonder......
...............................in the desert........
Written by Trudy Schrader on 03/30/2021
Copyright © Trudy Schrader | Year Posted 2021
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