Complicated Notes
So many voices.
Competing
for Real Estate
in my head.
“You’ll always be a loser”
“He’s smarter.”
“She’s better than you.”
“Why are you so stupid.”
“You’ll never amount to anything.”
“No one wants you.”
“Wait”
“Stop!”
“Don’t listen to them.”
“You deserve to be happy.”
“You’re lovable.”
“DUMMY!”
“Idiot!”
“Those voices are lying to you.”
“You’ve come so far.”
You’ve got this.”
“You have so much to offer.”
Sometimes,
I can push the bad voices
deep down inside.
I put a cork in it,
place glittering gold foil on top to make it pretty.
I install a wire cage around my neck
so my cork doesn’t pop.
The bubbles are kept at bay
year after year.
I’m both transparent and contained,
trying to decide if I’m ready,
Am I properly aged?
Is this my special occasion?
“They don’t want you.”
Self doubt whispers from deep within me.
Shame for what was done to me.
A gentle hand caresses my neck.
“You are ready.”
“Champagne must be shared!”
“Okay, I trust you.
Please don’t shake me,
I’ve already been shook,
shaken to my core.
Open me slowly,
pour me into crystal flutes.
Let me sparkle,
shine sunlight through me.
Smell my essence,
let me tickle your nose.
Feel my notes on your tongue.
Everything I have ever been
presented for your pleasure.
Only to be shared with a precious few.
The ones who love me.
The ones who spoke kind words into my soul.
My flavour, like me, is complicated.
Yes, I can be intoxicating.
So please drink me with care.”
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