Come Softly Now, Thou Little Haggis Bowl
Come hither, thine little Covid face
Puddin’, puddin’, all o'er the place
‘Er thou leapeth, looketh!
‘Er thou jumpeth, deepeth
Verily, verily, weeping weeper,
Look before thou leapeth!
O’ thou dearly beloved Burns
Scotland’s glory
Cheater, cheater, Haggis eater!
Had a wife and couldn’t beater
Stopping by thy Haggis wood
Without a frosty heater.
Jump, jump, jump I say
In thy brine, belly up
Bottom, bottom, bottom shine
Scrub-a-dub-dub
Thy poetry tub,
Darling mine!
Soup a contest,
Thou shall not stray
O' thee and thine alphabet poop
Shall never,
Nor so wickedly ever
Go so far astray!
Weary traveler, eerie ace
Stop and rest thy weary face
No disgrace, 34th place
Win it now
Thy blue-ribbon best
And lose the human race!
Now, say goodnight, crap
Turn on thy vacant stare
Turn off thy thinking cap
Twinkle, twinkle little star
Never stray, never far
From thy happy lap!
Copyright © Bryan Norton | Year Posted 2020
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