Color - Hutinashro Example


An example of Hutinashro form.  Hope you enjoy!  Or don't...I don't know...you do you.


I saw all the vivid color.
Life lived and butterflies fluttered.
Everything was truly perfect.
The birds all sung in harmony,
I lived and had fun carelessly,
Problems were something I’d neglect.
Then, they built up, burning inside,
Destroying all my useless pride.
It had began taking effect.
It had demolished everything,
Leaving me stuck here with nothing.
It had left me destroyed and wrecked.

I saw all the vivid color.
I watched it all become duller,
Reducing it to black and white.
Now suffering is all I have...
But love exists...my soul’s in half,
One half of dark, one half of light.
But why when I need help the most
Do you pretend that I’m a ghost,
And leave me here alone tonight?
I guess having friends is pointless...
Mine just treat me like I’m voiceless.
I guess I’ll sit alone and write.

And that is how I got out here,
Trapped alone in the dark of night,
Drowning in an ocean of fear.



This one didn't use iambic tetrameter, as you can see.  It would have taken too long, and 3 people have been asking me for an example.  Rushed, but it explains the form a little.  Hope this helps clarify the form.  Truly, I should probably just not sponsor a contest like this.  I rushed the example a little, and the rhymes aren't all that great.  But hopefully it's fine...

Copyright © | Year Posted 2018



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Date: 6/16/2018 9:52:00 AM
Connor. I agree with Caycay, AND by seeing this, I am guided to understand more fully what you expect from those who try your contest!
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Date: 6/10/2018 9:11:00 PM
Nicely done, Connor. Hugs Eve
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Date: 5/27/2018 8:00:00 AM
Not idiot, not rushed, not a negative-Connor anything. Stop that - delete it, everyone who raised you told me to have you do so. Even the most intelligently explained contests receive questions and your example does provide guidance in addition to being a clever and worthy read, I enjoyed it. I also enjoyed using your form. If your confidence is shaky like mine is, I offer my secret for consideration: fake it until you make it! All the best ... CayCay
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Eve Roper
Date: 6/10/2018 9:06:00 PM
:)
Date: 5/13/2018 8:39:00 AM
Thanks for providing an example. I enjoyed the read.
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Date: 5/10/2018 6:09:00 PM
This does work as a good example Connor and should clarify what you are looking for because Broken (Constance) will tell you that otherwise (it will still happen) your entries will spin your head LOL---I enjoyed your write.
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Date: 5/10/2018 5:24:00 PM
Connor, thanks for the example, really nice poem. It is a great form, thank you for sponsoring the contest, I love a contest that stretches my poetic muse.
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