Cobalt
How dare the sky have the audacity
To be so blue
So clear, so cloudless on the horizon
On a day like this
I’m just so angry, darling
Angry like slashing the bottle open into a too full shot glass
And chug it until it burns, until it burns like
When they slam my poetry against the wall
What the hell are these
Wordos
Doing here, in this poem, it’s supposed to be fantastic
But all you write is garbage
And expect it to stick
Angry like my mother
Angry like what the hell am I supposed to say
In this way, I consider myself religious
Tell me who I have to be
To earn some sort of Beethoven-istic seclusion of the mentally insane
Like Moonlight Sonata-ish dwelling peace of mind
Like the dun dun dun dunnn of the 5th Symphony’s opening lines
I’m just spilling out meaningless ideas now but
It would be nice to be myself at some point in time
It seems on these kind of days I barely understand myself
Estrogen driven resentment tearing at a velocity at that is quite
Beyond me at this moment as they stare at my hands
Gripping my already frozen cup of green tea
Tell me who I have to be
To be able to fit into these heels two sizes too big
To be able to please myself when I look into a parallel
Manifestation of this girl I used to know
Back in the day when Hip-Hop was free and I was madly in love
With the sky so cobalt blue.
Copyright © Bella Cardenas | Year Posted 2007
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