Celebrating Peace In Solitude - Collaboration With Sandra Stefanowich

Christmas day... scents from your chimney waft my way curtains aside, a dozen cars are dusted by snow boys in your yard cry out while pitching snowballs sensing both comfort and sadness holidays go on, even when stillness fills your home surrounded by memories of Christmases long past wondering what it would feel like to have family again don a shawl, footsteps crunch in fresh snow seeing a visitor from across the street, I wave while on my way to join a neighbor’s celebration preparing to smile at countless nameless faces aunts, uncles, cousins, nephews the “lady nextdoor” self consciously mingles aching for solitude; dreading it as well the visitor comes to mind, is she feeling the same where alone, holiday survivors learn to appreciate the peace.... I see a lady making her way next door she smiles and waves from across the street I give her a smile and wave back grateful for a moment to stall before going in we all showed as we said we'd do a gathering of "family" to pay our due appearances to appease somewhere else I'd rather be on this day is when I feel the most alone this feeling of distance when I'm in this home stilted, polite, unease when there's nothing left to say it was long ago, when we all went our separate ways it's gets too hard to remember reliving the yesterdays of December dreading being here, when solitude is what I want I wonder about that lady, is she feeling just like me where alone, I find refuge in the peace
*A collaboration with Sandra Stefanowich
Copyright © | Year Posted 2011

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Richards Avatar
November 18, 2011 at 3:44 PM
Such a touching and bittersweet colloboration this is, yet so honest and real, ....while watching so many happy faces, the holidays are often not what we are thinking. It is not always the way it seems, and it helps if we can be more understanding and perhaps, not force someone to "be Happy!" Well done to you both!
Richards Avatar
November 18, 2011 at 3:44 PM
ps...soup mail dear....! :)
Peranteau Avatar
November 18, 2011 at 7:06 AM
This write is real Carolyn. Wonderful write depicting the side of this holiday which many keep hidden. Great job dear poets ! Have a wonderful weekend dear Carolyn....much love, james
Fringe Avatar
November 18, 2011 at 5:28 AM
I surely can relate. I too feel the most lonely when surrounded by people. I am finding a way to exile myself from everyone who loves me. If I'm not careful, it will become permanent. Is that why we escape into the virtual? Is it just safer? This is a heart breaking write that has me pondering..........
Wesley Avatar
November 17, 2011 at 8:08 PM
Such a special one Carolyn, hard to tell who wrote what. I too feel the alienation at Christmas time as it is all so commercial.
Smith-Johnsen Avatar
November 17, 2011 at 5:40 PM
You two did a great job expressing your feelings on this one. Sadly, holidays can be so stressful for many...especially if obliged to live up to the expectations of others. Perhaps I have lived selfishly. When I was single, if I wanted to be alone I was. As an adult with spouse, children,...cousins, I always go to be around the members of my family that I love to be around.. I enjoy myself and them. I count my blessings: people to love who love me back. Friends are family! Be Happy. Hugs
Johnson Avatar
November 17, 2011 at 4:17 PM
And when the christmas bells do ring and carolers begin to sing. The spirits from within those walls will also join to deck the halls.
Roberts Avatar
November 17, 2011 at 12:03 AM
wonderfully penned, you two, great job on your collaboration
Locksley Avatar
November 16, 2011 at 2:43 PM
I know just how both of you feel. Since my husband was killed in the war I haven't felt like being with family on holidays either. There is some peace to be found in solitude. Best to you, Diane
Long Avatar
November 16, 2011 at 2:24 PM
beautiful nicely done.. cory
Horne Avatar
November 16, 2011 at 1:36 PM
Heartfelt and insightful write you two - you work so well together : )
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