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Can't we just start it all again l contrary l

I had this question in my mind 

is there any common ground that we can find 
and I looked for it signs 
and I didn't get any 
their are a millions of thoughts in my mind but I haven't really given them a thought ...any
but while yesterday I was training 
I tried to figure out all the situations that has happened between us 
I tried to map them and make a network of what was wrong happening between us 
then I got a text from a friend "you have tried enough ,now it's time to clean up. Just make a list of things you have done for her and she did for you.
You have disgraced yourself ,can you held your chin up ?"
that makes me thinking 
it took me some time to sink in 
and understand what he is trying to say 
that I took too much of time caring for her and I am too much out of my way 
and she ain't no slim and I ain't no Dre
and if I would have put even 10% of the efforts for someone else, she would have been madly in love with me 
I would have been her sunshine and she would have been my ray
But she is unlike any other girl ... Whatever you say...
"come on man !! let me give you a perspective, if you may"
 I get that dawg when I think about it 
now it makes me pissed off 
and i Imagine her thinking that I am a  head now 
at this point I felt so dizzy 
all the winds are against me 
girl do you want to just kill me ?no ?
You've already done that indirectly so..
yeah he is right !
I understand what you said there bro 
I let myself down while caring for her
or maybe I Am A Freak instead 
I treated her like a cheesecake , even when she was a burnt bread 
and she knew she didn't deserve it 
I treated her like an angel and I thought that it was perfect 
but she seem to be nice 
but now I am allergic 
of this girl not being clear 
In her mind 
but I had it 
my minds almost static 
now I am too illmatic 
it's time to be an addict 
of the game again 
because I have disgraced myself 
I am in shame again 
Now i have to prove myself worthy again
don't think I am angry on you Pac it's just me being lame again 
On you i could never be angry enough, its me on whom I'll put the blame again
because I wasn't good enough! right? 
I thought you may remember my birthday 
That you might 
wish me 
say that you miss me 
I am sick of this trickery 
but now I am done I am ahead of me 
there are a lot of words I said 
sorry I didn't mean it 
but I wanted you to see what has happened to me 
now you have seen it 
you know that I adore you 
but now it's time to go above you 
I am fed up of seeing you happy, ignorant and with no pain 
while inside I am all angry and insane
yeah I will say that now 
WE CAN'T and I DON'T WANT US to start it all again...

Copyright © | Year Posted 2019

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