Cancel Them All

I heard it from the internet, we’re now living in a new age, and all twinges of racism and oppression should go away. We have to change our sports team names, we have to tear down the statues, let’s target the problematic, I think I know more than a few. Now this might seem quite strange to some since I’m a fan of history, but I’m talking really evil stuff so take a moment and hear me: The first thing that we must look at, a political party of old, who’s done such damn horrific things when the whole of the tale is told. They cheer-led southern slavery, protected misery for decades, then stared a damn civil war, six hundred thousand in their graves! Then they created damn Jim Crow, said folks had to keep out the blacks, then reenslaved with the welfare state, it’s far time we cancel Democrats. There also is another group that hates half of the human race, yet folks associate with then, it’s an utter, absolute disgrace! They claim they’re nothing but toxic, all rapists and pedophiles, blame them all the world’s problems, and all sorts of things quite vile. But men don’t deserve all the hate, to treat them so is quite sexist. Are we to tolerate this crap? It’s time to cancel feminists. Finally, we should talk about a prophet of a major faith, Who warred, kept slaves and concubines, told his people this was a-okay. Many still do it to this day, and they point to Muhammed’s words, they treat women like lesser things, can you just imagine their hurt? Sexist, slavers, intolerant, what a grand cavalcade of wrong, Ii we really want a better world we might have to cancel Islam. I know, I know. But social justice demands it. You wouldn’t want to be called fascists, would you?