By Degrees- Childhood Reflections

The screen door slams behind me
As I rush out into the blinding sunlight
Wondering where my big brother is hiding
I better get to the pool before he finds me
And throws me into the ice cold water
That flows daily into the pool
From the cold mountain streams
Of the Elbrus Mountains

I have my pretty pink flowered bathing suit on
My second skin
I smile as I remember someone calling me a dolphin
When she saw me swimming in the water
Now I can’t wait to get in again

I feel the prickly yellowing grass beneath my feet
As I run toward the weeping willow….
My favorite tree in the whole compound
First phase of the run complete
I head toward the ancient mulberry tree
How I hate the squishiness under my toes
As I trample them in this patch of green
Where the grass is protected by the mighty branches
Of this gracious tree that provides us
An abundance of luscious fruit
We gather every summer in big bed sheets
As people up in the branches
Shake the tree

I’m on my final leg
Almost there
A rebel yell
And my brother swoops down on me
From behind the tree
I scream as I try to get away
But he sweeps me up in his arms 
And runs the last few feet to the pool
I shriek at the top of my lungs
Which will probably bring my uncle out yelling
Awakened from his afternoon nap

I want to go into the pool gradually
By degrees…
To get my body used to the icy coldness
And so I beg to be released
We are there
At the edge of the pool
One sweeping motion 
And water splashes up in rainbow sprays
As I sink below
Down into the icy depth at the deep end
Thinking this time my heart will stop
This time I will turn into a block of ice
And sink to the bottom
I will drown

A lifetime later
I break the surface and see him smiling down at me
The one who taught me how to swim
My strong older brother
Who would rescue me in a heartbeat
If need be...

I smile up at him
As I break into a smooth swim to the other side
Happy that he didn't let me play the fool 
Standing at the edge of the pool
Waiting to come down the steps
By degrees	
Waiting
To get lost
Into this liquid paradise
Of azure blue...

Eileen Manassian Ghali
Copyright © | Year Posted 2013

Poem

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Lamoureux Avatar
November 2, 2019 at 10:44 AM
I remember reading this gem and you sharing about your history. It was nice to immerse myself once again. Hugs Rick. I miss your visits.
Hunter Avatar
September 5, 2013 at 9:07 AM
I really enjoyed seeing you as a little girl, Eileen. I love to see memories of others, and you put it together beautifully!
Manassian Avatar
September 5, 2013 at 11:12 AM
I got so carried away with the memories I made lots of mistakes....RED mulberries. Cherries AS earrings...Oh..forget it...you get the gist! :)
Manassian Avatar
September 5, 2013 at 11:11 AM
ONCE out of the pool...drat!
Manassian Avatar
September 5, 2013 at 11:10 AM
Could you see it in your mind's eye, Caleb. Did the words come through for me? Did you see my uncle standing there yelling at us to be quiet? Awwwww...one out of the pool, we would go down and lie on the hot asphalt walkways...without a towel...the warmth hugging our bodies...We'd pick cherries when we weren't supposed to, and use sunflower petals as fake nails...cherries are earrings and read mulberries for lipstick! ;) Thanks for meeting the little me!
Macfarlane Avatar
September 5, 2013 at 7:54 AM
Eileen, what a delightful story and you told it with so much love. You decribed it so well it felt like I was there at the poolside watching. Hugs
Manassian Avatar
September 5, 2013 at 11:13 AM
:) Splish Splash....wanna come in for a swim? We can play hide and seek later!!! :) Aww....to be that little kid again! My mama was alive, and I didn't know better. I didn't know that she had MS....Thanks for sharing the memories with me...HUGS!
Seal Avatar
September 4, 2013 at 5:04 PM
Carefree days, then you grow up lol. Thanks for sharing a wonderful memory in a such a sunny splashy write. Take care Richard
Manassian Avatar
September 5, 2013 at 11:18 AM
Hubby still tells me I need to grow up and act my age...I'm 46 for crying out loud and not a teenager! GRRRRRRRR!!!! When I'm a GRANNY...I'll be wearing my bright make up, have flowers in my hair, and belly dance while using my walked....I REFUSE TO GROW OLD. I'm stuck in NEVERLAND. Join me...I think you need a bit of a break, Mr Seal!
Onclaud Avatar
September 4, 2013 at 12:46 PM
what an exciting view from where i am, eileen.. love the progression and pacing of your upbeat lines... lovely, lovely!..:) huggs
Manassian Avatar
September 5, 2013 at 11:20 AM
Thanks, my dear Nette....You are very sweet to write that. Hugs!!! HUGSSS!!!!
Bauer Avatar
September 4, 2013 at 9:11 AM
a beautiful memory which you've captured in gorgeous detail. i loved it!
Manassian Avatar
September 4, 2013 at 9:13 AM
:) Ilene....thank you!!!! :)
Tacito Avatar
September 4, 2013 at 8:22 AM
What a story. A powerful memory to treasure within your heart for life. I felt this writing.
Manassian Avatar
September 4, 2013 at 8:25 AM
I JUST posted on your poem! ;) How weird....Visiting at the same time! Thanks, Drake...Always a pleasure to have a visit!
Lamoureux Avatar
September 4, 2013 at 7:31 AM
I just love this piece, it made me feel happy. I felt emersed in the moment. I am honored to be the first to comment. Definately adding to my favorites. 7777777.............
Lamoureux Avatar
September 7, 2013 at 8:44 AM
The years since then have more than made up for my childhood. Thanks for your kinf thoughts.
Manassian Avatar
September 5, 2013 at 9:56 AM
Richard....the cursor is blinking at me...I don't know what to write...I'm staring at this empty space and thinking...how...how can I find the words to tell you how sorry I am that you couldn't have a carefree childhood...I'm so sorry, Richard...for the years he took away from you...You'll have them all back..One day...You'll get to be carefree and explore and travel in space and swim with dolphins and fly as free as a kite and laugh. One day...He has promised...I want to be there to see it all...Take care...God bless
Lamoureux Avatar
September 5, 2013 at 6:19 AM
I only have 3 weeks of carefree childhood memories. We escaped my Dad by running away to Thunder Bay. I could just be a kid but unfortunately he found us two weeks later and the hell was worse than before. The other week was when my brother and I got to spend a week with our grand parents.
Manassian Avatar
September 4, 2013 at 8:30 AM
Beautiful memories....I'll never forget my childhood....NEVER! I lived in paradise!
Manassian Avatar
September 4, 2013 at 8:27 AM
Richard...I've never been back. We moved to Lebanon a year before the revolution, we got to visit the summer before it started, and....I've never been back. I somehow don't want my childhood memories to be tainted by new realities. The sweetest years of my life....It used to snow where I lived. It would pile up so high that my brothers used to jump off the roof into the snow...
Manassian Avatar
September 4, 2013 at 5:18 AM
I was a few months shy of being born in the US...At 41 Mom found out she was pregnant and travel plans had to be postponed. Dad had to wait a few months more to start his MA studies. I was born in Tehran, Iran. I am an Armenian. After this first stint in the States (the 2nd came when Dad worked on his Ph.D), we went back to Iran where I spent 8 of the happiest years of my life. I will never forget the beauty of the compound I lived in, the fruit trees, the pool, the mountains...It lives in me!
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