Bigfoot Likes Breck Shampoo (

It is said in Oregon there is a legend that is very rare Everyone who has seen it says it is all hair It is quiet in its suburban surroundings This poor creature in the seventies we were constantly hounding The eighties came and the creature disappeared like a fad Only to resurface with a smell so rad We have left Bigfoot several gifts including films made by producer John Woo Recently scientists have translated some Bigfoot drawings, they reveal that Bigfoot likes Breck Shampoo They say Slinky is fun for a girl and a boy But experts say it's not something Bigfoot would enjoy We gave Bigfoot and Etch and Sketch to see if that was a hum dinger He sent it back to us with a drawing of the middle finger We put a food display out with a Wal Mart employee to offer samples of Dinty Moore Beef Stew Bigfoot gave the employee an old flyer and pointed at Breck Shampoo The employee commented that Bigfoot had a pleasant smell And now Bigfoot wants some DEP10 GEL The Goverment responds with a letter that reads boo hoo hoo The letter further stated that they are rejecting Bigfoot's request DEP10 GEL and Breck Shampoo The letter reads sorry, but technically you are an American, we only help those Illegals here and offer foreign aid, so there's nothing we can do Bigfoot demands some equality, a fair shake from the Government too All this contreversey could have been avoided by a donation of Breck Shampoo So he shaves himself to better fit in and learns Spanish and become an Illegal Mexican Now endless cases the Government will send Now there are Bigfoots everywhere some live next door to me and you No wonder I can't buy DEP10 GEL or Breck Shampoo