Bewildered

It’s hard to believe in myself, Lord, in these times of tribulation Can’t stand that you’re turning into someone else in frustration I’ve been extremely bewildered for so long How can I belong? Was I in the wrong? It’s difficult sometimes to pick yourself up from the hard, cold cement And start over again... Can’t stand the aftershocks of lament and the dire need to repent And start over again... How can I start over again? Rewind for a time and then Make a plan to change Change is a challenging chore We appear to be strange, But we strive to begin to hope and dream all the more All the more All the more I’ve been extremely bewildered for so long How can I belong? Was I in the wrong all along? Figuring you out Is like stopping the rainstorm from occurring out of nowhere My mind’s doubt Seems to make me feel tattered and torn in utter despair I’ve been immensily bewildered for so long How can I belong? Am I just a temporary song? It’s about time I start all over again I start all over again I start over again Start over again Over again Again Recycling the thoughts of grief Looking for a cure of mere relief Walk the road of recovery with me Endure the hardships of issues aplenty Moving forward is not easy at all We should be happy and stand tall I could bet to differ if I was in negativity’s hold I would have to be this strong, handsome warrior that’s so bold I don’t want to put up a fight I just want to have peace in my tiresome life I don’t want to put up a fight I just want to have peace amongst the strife It’s about time I start over again And begin a lifetime of positivity’s zen Ten times ten, I have been left to simply wander I wonder again Why am I bewildered? I ponder... Come on and lift me higher Come shine a little brighter Be a truth-bearer, not a liar Vanish away vain lust and desire I’ve been fighting the emotional fight for quite a while now Again, I tell you I don’t know what you’ve been through to the core Just so that you know, I am trying to look after you somehow What do you expect of me? Am I bound to be rejected once more? I recognize the aches and pains of the past, being a disgrace Connects with my lack of strength and being laid to waste away I realize that I go through so much suffering to be in last place Was lost until I was free in your embrace that drains away dismay I tried my best to believe in myself in these countless years of fears and tears Can’t understand the reason you changed from being good to bad as it appears I’ve been greatly bewildered for a long, long time and reality hits so hard this time That it’s about time I grow up and face my fears from summertime to wintertime