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Between the Words of My Father

I tried my best To live between your cruel words Yet there was no room I felt less Smaller than small So why didn't I fit? I wonder Now that you are gone Who's words had you borrowed? Did the pain you gave to me come from another's broken heart? Was it too much to bare? I now have room at the end of your sentences. Not forced within the confines of your spaces Tracing the manicured pearls of your wisdom You have not had the last word I am not doomed to your hypothesis I'm willing to dance on the edge My cliff is of note worthy of jumping from For I am not Icarus There is no reason to fear the sun Only your ice will melt from my wings I do not wish to re-live your convoluted nightmare The drifting of your mind Those barriers to my existence Freedom at last Yes Freedom At the end Yes At the end of your sentences. The lesson I learned is that the only one who can define my being is me. I also learned that painful words and curses can be passed on from generation to generation unless we put a stop to it. I thank God for the strength He provided me. I have been blessed beyond what I expected as a child.

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Rhonda Johnson-Saunders

Date: 5/18/2020 10:59:00 PM

Hi Richard, reading through some of my FAVEs tonight and this one is a stand out. I simply love the beauty in its honesty and hope. I remember how I related to it the first time I read it. I hope you and yours are staying safe and well. xx Rhonda

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 5/19/2020 10:42:00 AM

Thanks for saving it and coming back to read it.

Barbara Barry-Nishanian

Date: 7/16/2018 3:48:00 PM

May I echo, every one's comments. I can see how my,'Time to Discard Baggage' let you know how very much I would appreciate this sensitive and beautiful poem, I have and will reread again.

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 7/16/2018 5:02:00 PM

Thanks for such a thoughtful response.

Peter Walsh

Date: 3/31/2017 6:38:00 AM

What hasn't killed you ... has indeed made you stronger ...

Peter Walsh

Date: 3/31/2017 6:37:00 AM

Beautiful enlightening piece... no one can truly define us but ourselves and God ...

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 3/31/2017 7:27:00 AM

That is a truth that many are in the process of learning. Thanks for commenting Peter.

Maureen McGreavy The Insolent Rib

Date: 3/19/2017 10:06:00 AM

Yes indeed Richard, a very similar wounding experience and philosophy thereafter. Beautiful write about that ugliness. Thank you for sharing this me. xomo!

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 3/19/2017 10:17:00 AM

Thanks for checking it out Maureen. Hugs Rick.

Keith O.J. Hunt

Date: 3/6/2017 6:44:00 PM

I have to fave this Richard; this is simply one of the best poems I've read in awhile. It seems you've found your way through the thorns and brambles, I commend your courage and poetic expression:-)

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 3/19/2017 9:24:00 AM

Sorry for the late response to your thoughtful reaction. Time is at such a premium I have gotten far behind.

Andrew Jarvis

Date: 2/27/2017 2:02:00 AM

I can relate to this entirely. My father was a cruel man in his younger days, but now he's just a very old man with nothing left to say. Now I'm older I realise his father was the same way. With God's help I've put an end to it. As they say, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger" :-)

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/27/2017 8:08:00 AM

Amen to that. I wrote a book titled DUMMY, Hurtful and Healing Words. It deals with the aftermath of my Father's words and my healing. Thanks for commenting.

Rhonda Johnson-Saunders

Date: 2/27/2017 12:43:00 AM

With tears, I commend you for sharing! I have a similar story with my mother. She could be very cruel when she drank. She can still be cruel and harsh but not in the same way now that she's older. I try to love the nurturing mother side of her. Perhaps one day I'll have the courage to write about her abusive side. She doesn't read my poetry so she'd probably never know...thanks for sharing this. It goes into my FAVES. Hugs, Rhonda

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/27/2017 8:14:00 AM

Writing about it is quite healing. After I writing my book I have had many conversations with people like yourself who have gone through similar experiences. These conversations have made me feel much less alone. I'm glad I got to talk to my dad before he died. Difficult but necessary conversations.

Connie Marcum Wong

Date: 2/25/2017 7:15:00 PM

Richard, your keen ability to try to understand instead of embracing bitterness is commendable. When our parents are not what we wish they could be we often over compensate with our own children, showering them with love, or take on the learned behavior. The choice is ours to make and you convey this wonderfully in your wise poem Richard. Bravo! ; ) 7

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/27/2017 8:18:00 AM

Thanks Connie, with the help of my wife and God our son is thriving. He is compassionate, interesting, interested and enjoying a professional career. What more could we ask for? We are very thankful. We also appreciate his friends as they provide us much hope for the future.

Felicia Jarvis

Date: 2/22/2017 1:53:00 AM

You wonderfully and beautifully described the problem passed from parents to children in this poem with well selected words. Thank you.

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/22/2017 8:20:00 AM

Thanks Felicia.

John Hamilton

Date: 2/17/2017 12:39:00 PM

I concur 100% Rick, we do not have to allow anyone to mold us or define us, except for the Great Potter of course. I've moved past the pain as well a long time ago, now just feel sorry for him.

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/22/2017 8:21:00 AM

I try to see the kid he once was and that helps me feel more tenderly towards him.

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 2/13/2017 5:53:00 PM

WOw. Amazing poetry. FAVE

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/14/2017 8:11:00 AM

Thanks Andrea.;0)

Eileen Manassian

Date: 2/11/2017 5:37:00 PM

So much between your sentences that makes the mind wonder and grieve. I care so much for who you are that it pains me to know anyone could have made you feel less than a worthwhile person. Yes...I believe sometimes life cripples our hearts and we cripple others to ease the pain. I'm glad you can fly, dear. My priveledge is to watch you in flight.

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/12/2017 7:47:00 PM

No need to grieve, life is good. Thanks for being so caring. Hugs Rick.

Charmaine Chircop

Date: 2/11/2017 4:04:00 PM

Cont..Compassionate towards him.In my case though..Im not passing my pain to my girl..but I decided to learn from it and act exactly the opposite.Yes I want to be all my dad isnt..I lknow how good and positive you are..So indeed your life story made you the special wise .. kind..person you are. A fave

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/12/2017 7:48:00 PM

You are a good person so all is as it should be. Thanks for your thoughtfulness.

Charmaine Chircop

Date: 2/11/2017 3:59:00 PM

Indeed I can feel every word you've written.My relationship with my dad was always one sided ...He was always negative about everything due to his depression..So I always felt as if I do not have a dad...It took me many years to accept my life story. Indeed as you stated-Did the pain to me came from another's broken heart?'.I so believe people can carry with them the torment of their past and take it on others without knowing it..Like you I believe my dad suffered in his past so I try to be

Darren White

Date: 2/9/2017 11:59:00 PM

This incredibly beautiful poem fills me with sadness and happiness for you the same time. you found the strength to survive. I walk a similar but different path, and your words give me hope for the future. Thank you. May your belief continue to give you strength and may there always be people walking your path with you. Fave.

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/11/2017 1:36:00 PM

Thanks Darren.;0)

Elizabeth Kinch

Date: 2/9/2017 4:38:00 PM

When spirit triumphs it truly is magnificent and often makes one stronger than they could ever imagine. Congratulations on finding positivity from negatives. A soulful write and definitely worthy of a 7.

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/11/2017 1:36:00 PM

Thanks Elizabeth.

Freddie Robinson Jr.

Date: 2/9/2017 1:42:00 PM

Very soul-stirring, a triumph of the spirit this poem offers to us, Richard. An emotionally charged poem that shoot sparks of truth and past hurts amended. Wonderful poetry, very insightful. Love and joy to you.

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/11/2017 1:39:00 PM

Thanks Freddie, on my way to visit your space.

Daniel Turner

Date: 2/9/2017 11:07:00 AM

Painful lessons learned are never forgotten, Richard. We take the good, leave the bad and go from there. Are we ever really free from the past or do we just make peace with it? Great write

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/11/2017 1:43:00 PM

Good question, I suspect we make peace, some scars are very deep.

Mama Bear

Date: 2/9/2017 8:56:00 AM

You have had the strength to overcome the negativity of your father He was a troubled man and was never happy and wanted everyone else around him to also be unhappy You survived better than your siblings which is amazing More power to you and may you help others in similar circumstances Big 7 on this one knowing where it comes from Love Mom

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/9/2017 9:07:00 AM

Thanks mom, I have no complaints, life is good. I love you.

Probir Gupta

Date: 2/9/2017 8:27:00 AM

What a precious freedom ... Very true epilogue ... Very well written ...

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/9/2017 9:07:00 AM

Thanks Probir.

Arthur Vaso

Date: 2/8/2017 10:41:00 PM

When I met you you were tall not small, kind not belittle, warm, not cold, your smile was your introduction, you were quiet not loud, yet very open and had not a cloud. It is you who will ultimately help define others, and the world should be thankful of that! :)

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/9/2017 9:09:00 AM

A kind thing to say Arthur.

Carol B.

Date: 2/8/2017 10:40:00 PM

You're an amazing person Richard! I can't imagine how difficult your childhood must have been. You have a kind word for everyone. It takes strength and courage to break the cycle. I respect you a great deal.

Richard Lamoureux
Date: 2/9/2017 9:11:00 AM

Kindness has been shown to me by God so it is a natural response. Thanks for such a thoughtful comment.