Jeanna York Poet Lyric

Behind This Smile

~Behind This Smile~

These vicious memories are bogging me down
Like the weight of the world
Is resting on my shoulders
But no one can tell 
As I am so good at keeping
It all well hidden

~Behind This Smile~

Voices screaming at me that I don’t deserve to live
They even tell me ways to end it all
They are so loud I can’t hear myself think
Let alone carry on a conversation
Yet I keep it all

~Behind This Smile~

Inside I am crying, I feel like I am dying
I never let it be known
I keep myself closed in
~Behind This Smile~

It is hard to look in the mirror
I don’t like the person staring back at me 
She is so very ugly, filthy and fat
Who is this tramp I see 
Oh ya that is me
So I try to hide myself 

~Behind This Smile~

I feel like I am falling apart
It is getting harder and harder 
Each and every day
So Linda I beg of you not to look into my eyes
I know if you do you will see
All that I am trying to hide
Please don’t hug me unless you want for me
To fall apart
Because a storm is a brewing 

~Behind This Smile~

By Jeanna York

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Barbara Gorelick January 11, 2014 at 9:24 PM Oh, so sad. I have cowered behind the smile as well..Nice write and hope it helped some. Bg Jeanna York January 11, 2014 at 9:50 PM Thank You! It did help a little at least now I know why I have no energy and don't want to get out of bed.