Battle of Pigeon-Way

The days were getting long, and the Fourth of July was coming up, soon. With the City Park clean, a better raise might come, so very long over due. The Sheriff of Crazyland was cleaning pigeon poo, too often, lately. True! He was getting Crazier, by the minute, for his vacation hadn’t yet come thru. If those darn pigeons left the Park, that would be heaven, he definitely knew. The game a-foot, he decided, to remove them, did I say it was a full moon! So when he hosed those parks’ statues clean, he rousted the pigeons out, too. Little did he know, war was declared, ‘The Battle of Pigeon-Way’ now ensued. The pigeons were furious, our little citizens, had the right, like all else, to remain! Shakespeare’s statue became their flagship, with the pathways their flying lanes. The Pigeon Armada was stealthily hidden, amongst the trees, quietly, out of view. The Sheriff didn’t know, the depth and width of the battle, he had gotten into! D-Day came bright and early, as they buried him deep, in poo, giving him a clue. Back and forth they battled on, in earnest, determined, tactics, umbrella and poo. Sure, he had that hose, but those dirty pigeons had their own ammunition, too! Strafing runs were their thing, and their ammunition, well, You know! EWWW! The Sheriff didn’t have a clean shirt left, even patriotic ones, met their swan song. Kamikaze strafes and runs, were the name of the game, still the Sheriff, carried on. No one was hurt, though the Sheriff was soaked all the way, to his under-wear. No one went near the Sheriff, tho YouTube videos were in demand everywhere! Brooms and hoses were useless against the barrage, with a limited range…to stun. Finally the Mayor stepped in, he knew the battle of Pigeon-Way was finally won! Negotiating the terms of surrender, he approved a rotating fountain for the statues. Yep folks, the pigeons were now happy, and the statues would be clean… as new! Plus an oversize, birdbath, was made their very own… It was such a great win! Negotiations went on, as Dragon sat on the Sheriff, still mad and now embarrassed. The Sheriff simply glared his menace until he was taken away, in the back of the… City’s Mental Health paddy wagon, Yep! He finally got, his yearly paid vacation. And the Admiral Pigeon’s final demand instead of a lawsuit was accepted. As… He did a victory lap and final release on the Sheriff as answer, to the glare. Whereas... You might say he had just dotted his eyes, and crossed his T, as his signature, no less. There was no mistaking that event as the paparazzi caught it for the front page. Oh Yes! It was a Great News Day for Freedom and the Battle of Pigeon-Way! What a success! The moral to this story is: Before treading on citizens freedoms and what they believe... Try to first solve conflicts, by more peaceful means. OH! And always give your people vacations in timely fashion... as they need. Written by Carol Eastman 7-3-2016