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Barking Dogs and Screaming Kids

Barking dogs and screaming kids
Can drive a person to drink
There's nothing quite so disconcerting
Worse than loud music methinks

Hard to control a barking dog
They'll bite you and rip off your leg
Beating kiddies is wee bit extreme
But it's fun watching them beg

Go ahead whomp your child
As long as you don't leave marks
Strangling is definitely illegal though
Welts are sometimes quite dark

Betcha I'm gonna hear 'bout this
'Bout abusing li'l kids and all
Really they're only minor injuries
It's a blast to hear 'em bawl!



Just kidding!!!

© Jack Ellison 2013

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Timothy Hicks

Date: 3/11/2013 2:35:00 AM

Nothing like a little morbid humor before curling in the blankets! Can you believe that it's 2 in the morning and I'm here browsing P-Soup? Going to bed would be the sensible thing to do, but whoever said I had much sense? It's nice to see the lighter side of this site by reading your quirky poems... it seems to balance all the solemn ones I typically read.

Jack Ellison
Date: 3/11/2013 11:46:00 AM

Those late 2 a.m. nights are a thing of the past for me. Not by choice though... ye ole bod slows down much to my chagrin! "Quirky poems"... yeah! That's a great definition my friend! Could never put a label on it... thanks! LOL

Tim Ryerson

Date: 2/24/2013 4:29:00 AM

Strangling is illegal? Darn!... Homer Simpson does it to Bart all the time. Now barking dogs?...With pleasure!...Funny and clever as usual, Jack - Tim

Jack Ellison
Date: 2/24/2013 7:07:00 AM

Thank you, my good friend! Think I'll get up a petition to have the law changed and make it legal to strangle! LOL Whatcha think? Cheers!

Wayland Bunch

Date: 2/24/2013 4:05:00 AM

Now I'm scared you have become too crafty and have bawling grand children around and everyone has been fooled. Haha, I'm joking, well I think I am, lol. Nice write again Jack you never lose your touch. It's amazing the quality of your writing day to day.

Jack Ellison
Date: 2/24/2013 7:04:00 AM

Must remember to make sure they're only minor injuries though and difficult to detect! LOL You are too too kind my good friend! Hope your day is a happy one! Cheers!

Russell Sivey

Date: 2/23/2013 10:38:00 AM

Wow, Jack, you sure have come out and written a spanking of a write(ha ha)! Yeah I know your kidding because I think I know you by now...you really are a sweet old man who loves people and would give your shirt off your back to help someone in need...see I do know you don't I? This is an entertaining poem my friend! I enjoyed the noise you have created within this piece, I'm not one for noise either, and I'm not as old as you are Jack(not saying you are old my friend, just older)! Great Work!!

Jack Ellison
Date: 2/23/2013 1:41:00 PM

Yes... tongue in cheek, my good man! Happy to here you didn't take me too serious! LOL Cheers