Bacon, Biscuits and Beans

A cowpokes life is a rough one and when he draws his monthly pay,
He mounts his hoss and gallops to town to visit the local cabaret.
He scrubs the manure from his boots and dons a decent pair of jeans,
Hopin' to find some tolerable grub instead of bacon, biscuits and beans!

He spends his days herdin' ornery longhorns and fixin' barbed wire fences,
Ridin' in nasty weather and eatin' dust 'til he nearly loses his senses!
Fer all of this he expects some decent grub at the end of ever' day,
But Cooky dispenses bacon, biscuits and beans the same as yesterday!

Chuck is served up on battered tin plates and tin cups fer slurpin' joe,
And if'n you don't like it, Cooky is mighty quick to tell ya where to go!
The fellers complain to the trail boss but it don't do a damn bit of good.
He tells 'em, "If'n you don't like it here, find yerself another livelihood!"

At the cabaret he's confounded by the chinaware and fancy silverware,
And instead of sittin' on the ground to eat, he sits on a rickety chair!
He consumes a colossal steak with sweet peas and smashed pertaters,
A couple of beers and a salad of onions, lettuce and fresh termaters.

He and his old cayuse slowly meander back to the ranch to hit the hay,
But he'll return to the cabaret next month when he collects his meager pay.
He savored his scrumptious meal of countless calories and proteins,
'Cause he knows that tomorrow he'll be eatin' bacon, biscuits and beans!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
Copyright © | Year Posted 2016

Poem

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Laurie Avatar
October 3, 2018 at 8:52 PM
G'day Bob … a cowboy's hotel certainly has more stars and a diet he wouldn't want to get sick of. Although the menu could read on special days - beans, bacon, and biscuits - thanks Bob - Lindsay
De Beaulieu Avatar
November 12, 2016 at 1:38 PM
Hello Robert,I like beans and I like my bacon nice crispy so the only thing i would leave is the biscuit. I enjoyed this poem.
Hauser  Avatar
September 28, 2016 at 6:54 PM
Hahaha! Love it!
Smith Avatar
September 27, 2016 at 11:26 AM
Good one Robert, brought to mind the campfire scene from Blazing Saddles...
Vaso Avatar
September 26, 2016 at 8:16 PM
Brought me a smile, great , funny poem!
Merryman Avatar
September 26, 2016 at 8:01 PM
I enjoyed reading your entertaining poem, Bob! You've certainly got the cowboy vernacular down. Great write, Bob! Love, Kim
Bauer Avatar
September 26, 2016 at 5:30 PM
a classic hinshaw gem which i thoroughly enjoyed, bob! i was delighted to see pertaters mentioned, too, of course. i'd love to see a book with all of your wonderful stories in it - your rhythm and rhyme are very addictive...
Turner Avatar
September 26, 2016 at 4:36 PM
Well old friend, being raised on bacon, biscuits and beans, I understand completely. The only difference was I had to wait 18 years. Lol Love the story Bob!
Read Avatar
September 26, 2016 at 4:31 PM
I've often thought that the chuckwagon food would be pretty boring. Cute little story and lots of imagery.
Allison Avatar
September 26, 2016 at 4:24 PM
what a delightful tale Robert - am getting used to the lingo I understood every word lol:-) hugs jan xx
Onclaud Avatar
September 26, 2016 at 3:48 PM
you sure are a cowboy in your own right, bob... delightful play of words and food selection..huggs
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