Audra Cady To Daughter: a Spoon River Poem

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Spoon River Anthology, by Edgar Lee Masters (1915)  is a collection of

free-verse poems in which the dead address the living.  

Audra means "noble strength"; Cady means "pure."

 

I didn't always adhere to the warnings of the experts
		who declared nothing beyond time-outs should be used
		to correct a child’s behavior—that parents must not,
		even temporarily, take away a toy or a privilege OR
		use “psychologically damaging” responses like
		“What you just did was bad”!

		When you, as a teenager, fought me at every turn,
		when you despised me--or seemed to--
		the experts' words came back to haunt me.
		Still, I continued on my chosen path and tried
		not to reveal how defeated and helpless I felt.

		While the renowned psychologists were saying, 
		"The teenager's privacy must not be violated,"
 		I was watching you, not always from afar.
		When, in spite of me, you began accomplishing a degree
                privacy at the tender age of 14, you hid from me, opting 
                to use that freedom to forge risky relationships
		that alienated you from those who really cared.

		Over time, something beautiful happened.
		You metamorphosed into a fine young lady.
		As a parent, you have neither punished severely
		nor spoiled your children. You've limited 
		their privacy and kept hold of the reins.
		As they sneer at you and rebel, you wonder,
		as I once did, If you've taken the wrong route.
		I can't verbally assure you that you haven't.
		I can't give you an encouraging embrace.
		Perhaps I did enough while I was there.


January 1, 2019, entered in Emile Pinet's Free Verse Style Poetry Only contest,
placed 2nd


February 4, 2019, entered in Chantelle Anne Cooke's Favorite Free Verse Contest

Copyright © | Year Posted 2019



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Date: 2/3/2019 8:23:00 PM
Hello Janice, I have nver had children. My husband had children from his second wife. Not with me. I do not know how to be a parent.I like the way you have express yourself in this poem. have a nice evening my friend.
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Janice Canerdy
Date: 2/3/2019 10:30:00 PM
Thanks so much, Darlene. Janice
Date: 1/23/2019 7:05:00 AM
Ah, Janice, beautifully expressed poetic "woulda-coulda-shouldas". Children, the most precious gift that doesn't come with instructions.
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Janice Canerdy
Date: 1/23/2019 8:59:00 AM
Thanks so much for this comment, John. When I think of how things COULD have turned out . . . . Janice
Date: 1/22/2019 5:05:00 PM
As a once rebellious teen, and now, as a mother of six grown children, I can relate on so many levels to the elegant, emotional beauty of your poem. I love the Spoon River style of your stirring piece. Your last line is so very moving.. Superb poetry. Congratulations, Janice, on your wonderful win. Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan
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Janice Canerdy
Date: 1/22/2019 6:38:00 PM
Susan, thank you for this wonderful review! Janice
Date: 1/22/2019 8:41:00 AM
Congratulations Janice! Your poem has placed "Second" in my PoetrySoup contest. It was a very tough contest to judge, well done my friend, Emile.
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Janice Canerdy
Date: 1/22/2019 6:39:00 PM
Emile, this message has made my day! Thank you so much! Janice
Date: 1/1/2019 4:04:00 PM
This seems so real and personal.. but I guess you will say it is fictional.. Well expressed Janice..
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Janice Canerdy
Date: 1/1/2019 5:26:00 PM
I admit it's partly true, but--compared to some other kids--mine was really TAME! Of course, the part about my being dead is fictional. LOL! Thanks for the comment, S.O. Janice
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