Around the Sun Again
So here I am
64 years after
my mother
gave me
the gift of Life
and I have
so much regret
I have so many failures
and so many I wish
I would have moments
I should have
stayed with
little, cuddly Ali,
she was an honest soul
with no bad bones
in her body
unfortunately
I was attracted
to another
I left Ali
and I feel
bad about the
way I ended
our relationship
it was something
I had to do
my new girl
was stunning
she truly was
why she fell for me
I don't know!
we had
great times
together
we shared glittering
memories
and we also shared
the darkest of times
culminating
in her mental breakdown
and nothing can prepare
you for the
sledgehammer
of being
among smokey
shadows of despair
her mother
thought she was
directing a pantomime
making her daughter
a panto villain
of course I was blamed
for her breakdown
it was my fault
obviously
her mother
who claimed to be a Christian
never liked me
I was a working class lad
they were middle class
and had money
I was a long haired hippy
and I was not
a Christian
I was a new age demon
who led mommy's
sweet girl astray
yes her family
had money
but I never
found any love there
luckily for me
the psychiatrist
took me aside
and told me
the breakdown
was due to family trauma
that had begun
in childhood
so much for having money
and some forty years later
I return to my
darkest and harrowing
of memories
she never fully recovered
although she was
fine for five or so years
but the meds killed
my angel
who was never the same
again
and yes
I still love her
I always will.
Lenny Gazbowski © 2024
Copyright © Lenny Gazbowski | Year Posted 2024
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