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Are You Sitting Comfortably

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Thanks to Brenda Meier-Hans for helping me amend this for the contest:-)

A gent from the South Scottish Isles had terribly painful large piles when he tried to sit down he would grimace and frown soft cushions he hoards in big piles! syllable counter used 'how many syllables' 8,8,6,6,8 11~11~ 2014 poem revised for contest 18~11~14 Contest:Limericks Clean and Clever Sponsor: Roy Jerden

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Rajat Kanti Chakrabarty

Date: 1/18/2015 10:10:00 AM

piles on piles/ pain on pain/never smiles/ Dry or bleeding hahahahaha hemorrhoid Jan. Love>>>rajat

Jan Allison
Date: 1/18/2015 10:30:00 AM

Mum has them Rajat they are a real pain in the bum:-( hugs jan xxx

Earl Schumacker

Date: 11/23/2014 4:51:00 PM

Hi Jan, This is a contest winning Limerick if you ask me. It is "clean and clever" by conventional standards so I don't understand why you did not win. Nice job. Keep up the great work. Earl

Jan Allison
Date: 11/23/2014 4:54:00 PM

I think maybe the subject wasn't deemed 'clean' whatever the reason it didn't get placed i am happy with it as a clever limerick:-) thanks for your support Earl:-) hugs Jan xx

Dorian Petersen Potter

Date: 11/14/2014 12:28:00 AM

Very humorous limerick Jan! Gl in the contest! A 7 for you! Love and hugs! xxxx D.

Jan Allison
Date: 11/14/2014 2:21:00 AM

Thanks Dorian:-) Hugs Jan xx

Paul Callus

Date: 11/12/2014 12:35:00 PM

So glad you managed to get there, Jan; would have been a pity leaving your humour to go to waste! This is great...I can already see it on the winners' list:) (..on mine for sure!) hugs // paul

Jan Allison
Date: 11/12/2014 2:36:00 PM

Thanks Paul:-) Hugs jan xx

Shadow Hamilton

Date: 11/12/2014 5:00:00 AM

love your humour Jan very good limerick gl in contest hugs Fav'ing this

Jan Allison
Date: 11/12/2014 5:45:00 AM

Thanks so much Shadow:-) Hugs jan x

Ravi Sathasivam

Date: 11/12/2014 2:16:00 AM

Very interesting. Cleverly done. Enjoyed. Tfs

Jan Allison
Date: 11/12/2014 2:18:00 AM

Thanks Ravi:-) Hugs Jan xx

David Teminijesu

Date: 11/11/2014 11:48:00 PM

lol jan...so funny...*hugs*

Jan Allison
Date: 11/12/2014 2:09:00 AM

Thanks David:-) Hugs Jan xx

Tim Smith

Date: 11/11/2014 6:36:00 PM

Very funny Jan...butt ...hugs Tim

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 6:38:00 PM

lol:-) Hugs Jan xx

Maurice Yvonne

Date: 11/11/2014 6:05:00 PM

Great lime Rick. Sorry I meant great limerick Jan. Have you considered entering it in Roid's contest. Sorry I meant Roy's contest. I am sure this will be a big winner and I'm not being cheeky.

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 6:09:00 PM

LOL Thanks Maurice - - spurred on by Andrea and Brenda's comments and assistance is now entered in the contest - would have been a bit of a bummer if I hadn't :-) hugs Jan xx

Ilene Bauer

Date: 11/11/2014 5:39:00 PM

clever and cute! good luck in the contest...

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 5:40:00 PM

... and extremely painful lol - thanks Ilene:-) hugs jan xxx

Dan Helppi

Date: 11/11/2014 5:38:00 PM

;)

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 5:38:00 PM

:-) Hugs Jan xx

James Fraser

Date: 11/11/2014 4:58:00 PM

Ouchy ouch, another hard couch. A rubber ring, so no haemorrhoids sing. Good luck in the contest Jan. I doubt this will be at the bottom ;-) - James xx

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 5:00:00 PM

Ha ha ha Thanks James xxx Hugs jan xxx

Brenda Meier-Hans

Date: 11/11/2014 4:50:00 PM

Great job Jan! Good luck in the contest.

Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 11/11/2014 5:10:00 PM

It's VERY brilliant!

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 4:54:00 PM

Aww thanks Brenda - if it wasn't for yours and Andrea's encouragement it wouldn't have been entered in the contest so thank you my friend:-) Hugs Jan xx

Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 11/11/2014 4:50:00 PM

I did very little. You are a great poet.

Faye Gibson

Date: 11/11/2014 4:49:00 PM

Haha, Jan...I wouldn't call this dirty. It's funny. You do this kind of writing so well.

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 4:53:00 PM

Thanks Faye the syllable count was originally 7 and i wasn't going to submit it until Andrea commented then Brenda helped with the final version so if I win the credit must be shared:-) hugs Jan x

Matthew Anish

Date: 11/11/2014 4:39:00 PM

You have written an amusing limerick here. I volunteer 3 times a week at Poets House and there are a number of limerick volumes there. There are 60,000 volumes of poetry there! Peace & Love Matthew Anish

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 4:42:00 PM

wow Matthew that sounds absolutely amazing - a bit like heaven lol!!!! Hugs Jan xx I have to thank Brenda for her help - I wasn't going to submit the poem until Andrea suggested it then Brenda helped with a few amendments:-)

Brenda Meier-Hans

Date: 11/11/2014 4:12:00 PM

Mail

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 4:16:00 PM

Thanks Brenda - I have replied:-) hugs Jan xxx

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 11/11/2014 3:50:00 PM

why NOT for the contest? This is one of your very best limericks, Jan!!!

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 3:52:00 PM

If YOU think its ok then I will need to amend the syllable count - its supposed to be clean! Hugs Jan xxx

David Meade

Date: 11/11/2014 2:54:00 PM

Your poem is a real pain in the a$$ -- nicely done . . . it's good to laugh, you brighten my day. Gentle hugs.

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 2:56:00 PM

lol David - your comment made me giggle - thanks I am in need of humour today:-) Hugs Jan xx

Casarah Nance

Date: 11/11/2014 2:45:00 PM

haha oh this was funny, you should enter it!

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 2:48:00 PM

I can't Cas - it doesn't have the correct syllable count (minimum of 8 for lines 1 2 and 5) and I guess it wouldn't be considered 'clean and clever' otherwise I'd willingly submit it lol:-) Hugs Jan xx

Sandip Goswami

Date: 11/11/2014 2:37:00 PM

Very interesting. I know him...Best wishes to you..

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 2:38:00 PM

LOL Sandip:-) Hugs Jan xxx

Charmaine Chircop

Date: 11/11/2014 2:33:00 PM

You always entertain my heart dear: )

Jan Allison
Date: 11/11/2014 2:34:00 PM

Thanks Charmaine - I hope it made you giggle:-) Hugs Jan xx