Anxiety

I'm going to bed at 10:30 tonight, cause I know il have a 2 hour psychological warfare until past midnight, morning, I managed 5 hours sleep, floods of cortisol starting to peak I need go brush my teeth but I can't look my self in the fu**ing mirror, what I really mean is, I wish I weren't me, subconscious tackle calling me to my dingy pit, minds going off like fireworks, I'm really considering it, anxiety the c captain off my ship, I know, I need to get a grip!