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Another Four

ALWAYS CHECK YOUR TANK 

Johnny Smiths gang had just robbed the town bank
With gang members scar face Mike, and old Hank
Their getaway car 
Wasnt going far
Cos Hank forget to put gas in the tank...

SHIVER ME TIMBERS

An old pirate had woodworm in his leg
Wanted to go ashore for a new peg
As he walked down the gangway
His old withered stump gave way
He cursed as o'er the side went his rum keg... 

THE GRADUATE

It was Elaine Robinsons wedding day
Poor Ben shouted through the window "no way" 
Mrs Robinson just glared 
All the congregation stared
As Elaine and Ben made their getaway... 

CAN'T SIT

A window cleaner was cleaning the glass 
Spied the owner in bed with a young lass 
Asked could he join in the fun
Saw the owner get his gun
Now cant sit cos of buckshot in his a.s.s...


Written 1st September 2020.

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Michelle Faulkner

Date: 9/13/2020 8:24:00 PM

Funny stuff, Tom, guess the common theme is 'be prepared!'

Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/14/2020 10:28:00 AM

Thank you very much Michelle, now if they'd all been boy scouts lol. Hope alls well. Tom

Lindsay Laurie

Date: 9/2/2020 8:18:00 PM

Hello Tom ... you're really on a limerick roll right now, and they're all a pleasure to read. Thanks for all Tom - Lindsay

Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/3/2020 2:34:00 AM

Thank you Lindsay, im happy you enjoyed them. Tom

Silent One

Date: 9/2/2020 1:39:00 PM

Four very funny limericks.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/2/2020 2:19:00 PM

Thanks S. O., im glad you enjoyed the humour. Tom

Panagiota Romios

Date: 9/2/2020 7:56:00 AM

Hi Tom..you know which one I like best... LOL Love The Graduate...saw that movie so many times. I wanted to be Mrs. Robinson...go figure that one. I can't. Pangiexx Excuse my late response. Eyes bothering me.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/2/2020 8:51:00 AM

Thank you Panagiota, thanks for the inspiration on that one.lol The graduate is a great movie, I always watch it when it's showing. Tom

Janice Canerdy

Date: 9/2/2020 5:52:00 AM

Thanks for the laugh, Tom. Janice

Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/2/2020 5:57:00 AM

Thank you Janice, I'm happy you enjoyed the humour. Tom

Mark Koplin

Date: 9/2/2020 3:36:00 AM

You truly have a talent to spread smiles and laughter my friend! I love your limericks, great job!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/2/2020 5:25:00 AM

Thank you very much Mark, im happy that you enjoyed them. Tom

Anne-Lise Andresen

Date: 9/2/2020 1:32:00 AM

- Thank you ... yes we need laughter ... you always deliver with skill and humor in your limerics - Have a lovely day, Tom :) - hugs // Anne-Lise :)

Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/2/2020 1:57:00 AM

Thank you very much Anne, they say laughter is the best medicine, I fully. Been a dark year so far, just hope things dont get worse with the coming of winter. Hope you too have a good day. Tom

Brandy Nicole

Date: 9/1/2020 8:40:00 PM

(Giggle) I love the first one and the last one best. With no gas in the car, it will not move. Promise you that. And, watch out for window cleaners, looking in, just wanting to have some fun- and those with guns. This is cute and clever. I am smiling. :) Brandy

Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/2/2020 12:55:00 AM

Thank you very much Brandy, im happy you enjoyed them. We cant have enough laughter with that big covid cloud hanging over us. Hope you're well Tom

Gershon Wolf

Date: 9/1/2020 8:08:00 PM

Gotta check that gas tank, eh?! Just love all of these, Tom. You are the 'Lord of the Limerick!' Alert coming soon for your crowning by the Queen Mother... :) gw

Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/2/2020 12:53:00 AM

Thank you Gershon, it was Panagiota who inspired the first one. I'd have a long wait, she passed years ago lol. Tom