An Hour of Jealousy

I felt jealousy tonight with my might - Where have my love been? I have my hours when I get excited and then so low... But, I'm not a coward, but oh so bold I'm sorry for my episodes... I lost my mind's trillion trains I am a lonely lake with a single toad I have my moments when I feel like I'm going to explode... Overwhelmed by a million roads I am walking the narrow road - Forgiveness is in my veins I inflict the hurt on others alright - wish I could feel happy again I'm hurting myself emotionally In the end, I want to be set free The hardships get so hard to cope with I just need someone near my side Our love affairs, unfortunately, are not a myth I'm worried I am painting tragedy in my life You stabbed me with rejection and inner strife I am lost in lust fantasies I fantasize, nearly at ease I am a captain in this ship Of renewal and friendship I am the king of my fantastic fate I will wait I can't wait Till I become who I want to be Jealousy made me mad Envy makes me so sad I'm smiling - now I'm glad I love myself in my skin I know, Lord, I've been bad I feel paper thin from within Resentment disappeared Cheer and joy just appeared Vanish away vulgarity and cursing The music in mind is rehearsing I dislike the fact that you made me like this, Satanic sadness and discomforting distress I will listen to God when His time ticks my direction I will glisten and He heard my prayers of affection I hate you, Jealousy...that lasted not too long...I want to belong Haven't a clue Who I've become, honey, stuck in the wretched wrong Lord, have I passed Your test? Jealousy is what I really detest I feel you in the depths of my heart Until you kissed him and I fell apart Jealousy slithers in me substantially I had a good night actually - I know I look pathetic Until negativity took a hold of me Okay, I'm sorry for my ridiculous jealousy - godly forgiveness is epic