Amnesty

When someone that you love dies
Its easy to blame yourself for their death

Even if you were nowhere around when they died
Its easy to find something in the past 
some wrong that you did to blame yourself

The police report read that he lost control of his car
And you remember when he asked you for money for tires
You said no because you felt this was another money game trick
But when you offered your road assistance card 
You hope that he would use it

Children dressing up and scaring one another
Halloween orange pumpkins lost a lot of meaning in the early years.

And the guilt that you bore
Weigh heavy like a noose on your neck

Time past and every year on his death anniversary you ask for forgive
And even when you forgive yourself it was not enough
A judge and jury conviction of innocent would not have been have satisfied you

But the red fox forgave you
Red his favorite color of his football jersey
The stare down was unforgettable
Looking directly at you and saying why
Do you play this blame game

His Spirit shape-shift inside the fox
His trickster and playfulness a strong indication that 
if might be him

His Spirit whispering words to you as you cleaned the dust
of decades off his picture that sat in a place of pride on the day that he died

The words of amnesty were spoken
The voice that said the car did not kill me
Drugs and alcohol did
Copyright © | Year Posted 2019

Poem

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Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace