All You An Eat

ALL YOU CAN EAT by JOHN M. ARRIBAS I never subscribed to an unusual idea That aliens are among us and thriving here I now question my stand on that theory Cause I’ve noticed some bodies quite eerie I see gigantic beings wherever I go They start out big and continue to grow The government is aware and brands them obese “Double order of nacchos, extra cheese,pleeze” Take an visual survey, you’ll see what I mean Two thirds are enormous, one third lean These immense bodies are easy to spot They’re all about you, an infinite lot But what really puts a strain on my eyes Mammoth women, in shorts, with chaffing thighs Men fare no better with a belt line bulge Storing those carbs that they love to indulge Some come in pairs, a man and his wife How can they ever produce new life Their sizable girths prevent conjugation How could these two contemplate creation Now that I’m at it I’ll take one more swipe That’s a long reach how the heck do they wipe? Go to the eatery inside any mall You will find food venders stall after stall There is one sight you are bound to find Those colossal rear ends in every line Its hard to imagine when you see how the suet bounces How could this giant have once been 6lbs , 4 ounces If the mall doesn’t convince you, here’s a treat Go to a place that vends “all you can eat” Here you’ll find the insatiable glutton Ingesting soups, salads ,meats even mutton While they’re devouring six cutlets of veal They’re mentally planning their next meal All you can eat(2) Who are these beings of quivering blubber So elastic their skins, must be made of rubber Their shapes are odd and hard to express Super wide at the middle, good lord what a mess Here comes a woman with voluptuous breasts Matched by her buttocks and all the rest I’m sure that I’d become nervous and frantic Trying to make love to someone so gigantic A family outing to a local college game Reuniting with friends that all think the same What brings them together is not the event It’s the tailgating activities under each tent Its barbeque ,wings ,ribs and potato salad Nary a care bout the pounds they’ve added Later that day as they go home a winner Someone will ask hey “ what’s for dinner’? Before calling it a day they’ll have a bite Not much left , they’ve eaten everything in sight Hours before breakfast and all through the house Not a creature was eating not even the mouse The children nestled asleep in their beds While visions of cheeseburgers danced in their heads The idea that aliens account for gastronomical lust Is totally fictional a complete and utter bust These giants among us are locally bred Victims of gluttony ,sumptuously fed The agricultural interests quickly deduced Corn syrup a must in all foods we produce The dairy interests are even harder to beat You’ve got to add cheese to everything we eat