Again and Again
It's that time of the night again
It's the time of the night where everyone else I know is asleep and I am awake
I think about the day we met
I think about the day you left
I think about every moment we had that I loved
And every moment that I hated
You had me wrapped around your finger
You had me on a leash like a dog
Everyone said we were whipped
But I disagree
Is it called being whipped when you are simply doing the person you love a favor
Or when you hold open the door
Or when you go out of your way to make them happy?
I don't think so
I call that love
You had me in love
You trapped yourself in my heart
Never to escape
I try to set you free but the lock is too strong
Your words echo in my mind
I hear you say "I love you"
Then I hear you say "I hate you"
I feel the knife slowly being shoved into my chest
I can feel my body collapsing
Those words begin to loop
I love you
I hate you
I love you
I hate you
Which is it?!
Do you love me or do you hate me
And just like the words in my head
We are running on a loop
We keep coming back again and again
And then we leave again and again
It's like we want to let go but we can't
I have made everyone believe that I could never love you again
I have made everyone believe that you are the tire tracks behind my car
My parents hate you
My friends hate you
Everyone I know hates you
But I don't
I could never hate you
Because you see
You still have me tied on that leash
You still have me wrapped around your finger
But see I'm naive
You could tell me you loved me and I'd believe it
Because you told me you loved me for a year and I trusted what you said
And now you know
My brain is a bipolar cycle
I love you
I hate you
My brain is stuck on that loop
That never ending loop that makes me believe that I'm done with you
That I hate you
But I don't
Cause see it comes right back
Telling me that I don't hate you
That I need you
But see I don't
Because you are just the guy I see in the hall way
The one I pass everyday
You are the guy I had a past with
But we could never have what we had before
And I think that it's time that we both saw that
Before we get hurt again and again.
Copyright © Dacia Schneiderman | Year Posted 2015
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