Addiction Ii
Addiction II
I listen carefully to gage what you are covering up
To hear if your words are slurred
Or your outlook too bleak,
Or if you have verged into mania.
I tell myself,
This is the nature of addiction.
I try not to take it personally, but
I internalize your depression and misplaced rage.
I love to hear from you on a good day
Straining towards the normalcy in your voice
Recalling how you once were, and could be again
Imagining all the fun we could have as sisters.
Setting myself up to fall when you crash.
I cover for you to try to spare others the worry
How many stints in the ICU will it take
“to reach rock bottom?”
I have been encouraged to walk away but I cannot.
My guilt and my love and my powerlessness weigh heavy.
This is the nature of addiction.
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