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Accumulating Anger: When the Clock Chimed 9

I took a long, thought-provoking walk
I jumped off the car, never knowing why
I looked out the window and began to talk
Accumulating anger got the best of me - I can't deny

I saw her kiss a man
Anger got the best of me
I saw her kiss a man
Anger was all I could see
I saw her kiss a man
Anger was in my eyes of youth
I am strong - I believe I can move on best I can

But, to tell you the honest truth,
It was only a crush…
I embarrassingly blush
My screams are hushed
My negativity and positivity is ambushed

I just felt so numb inside
When the clock chimed nine
I just felt awful and cried
When the clock chimed nine
I'm sorry I felt this way
When the clock chimed nine
But, as they say, tomorrow is a day away

Last night, I had strong rage on a different page
It was like a singer who forgot his lyrics on stage
I apologize for being aggressive with my words
But, I couldn't help, but release my muse birds

I had strange, delusional dreams after midnight...
I was so scared, yet couldn't describe my fright
I remember walking home so briskly, so frustratingly, so much racing thoughts that were so fast-paced with my endless heart beat
I remember opening up the door from the back because I was embarrassed to be seen from the front...thankfully, I didn't hurt my aching feet

Listen to me - 
I was angry
Because of the fact that she didn't consider my feelings no doubt
She didn't care if I was around to witness them making out

When the clock chimed 9,
I walked away - I knew it was a sign
For me to move on
Till the break of dawn

I left everyone in utter fear for a while...for a while…
I was safe in the streets, in which I walk for a mile
I couldn't smile cuz of the regret I hoarded inside
I can't just quit yet - I still got my confident stride

Forgive the wrongs that I've done to everyone around me
I will sing you songs of many emotional traumas for all to see
When my time is up and it strikes 9 again,
I'll be up and about with my monsoon hair and then…

I'll just be a stranger to you
This anger says you're no friend of mine
I'll just be a stranger to you
The ancient bells chime after nine so fine
I'll just be a stranger to you
This anger accumulated for years says it's time to carry on with my life and leave all my worries behind...it's time the clock chimes and for me to shine

I won't resent your fickle relationship
I just feel empty, but I must get a grip
I won't be afraid to talk to you once more
But it won't be the same friendship we had that had so much in store…

I don't like you like that anymore..
We weren't together in the first place
I didn't say you were the one I adore
We weren't together - let's face it face to face
I just don't like you like that
We can still somewhat chat
Maybe it's for the best I didn't make a move or I'd be God's disgrace

Somewhat speechless to say the least...
In loss of words as you dine and feast
Upon your lover like no other all along
He's a good man to be around - don't get me wrong

But...still, you made me feel agitated to the max
Due to your senseless, heartless and disgusting actions and decisions
But...maybe I need to really sit back and chillax
Do you understand the consequences of your foolishness? Don't you even give me your stupendous reasons

But I got over her…since a few weeks ago
What's remaining is anger and woe though
Her behavior was reckless and evil as hell
Oh well, I can't look after her in my cell and crawled in my shell

When it struck 9,
Everything wasn't fine
I walked away in sadness and madness
Shame on her for acting very careless

Everything was going downhill
I took a couple of chill pills still
When it struck 9,
I had chills go down my spine

Anger embraced me, never leaving my presence
Infuriation caressed me, making me want to seek repentance
Shame on me for acting so reckless and in distress
Shame on her for being rude, sinister and delirious

I won't resent your crappy relationship
I just feel empty, but I must get a grip
I won't be afraid to talk to you once more
But it won't be the same friendship we had that had so much in store…

Everything was going downhill
I screamed in rage childishly like a child who is ill-will
When it struck 9,
I had chills go down my spine
Everything was going downhill
I yelled at the top of my lungs like a mad maniac, having a thrill
When it struck 9,
I had chills go down my spine
Everything was going downhill
I took a couple of chill pills still
When it struck 9,
I had chills go down my spine
So, I took a long, thought-provoking walk

Boy, was I pissed…
The moment they kissed…
Girl, I am pissed…
She will not be missed…
No wonder I fuss and cuss...
No wonder I need the Lord and Jesus…
Because I need forgiveness and mercy…
From on high...to set you and I free…

You think it's so funny that I'm in pain
Well, I believe you are wild and insane
I want to call you the 'w' word or the 's' word,
But that would be your kind of low class absurdity I heard

I don't mean to act snappy and I was an insane mess
But I was sorely defeated with such vain unhappiness
My accumulating anger was due to the fact that the clock chimed 9
Because during that time, you made love to him and made our friendship love serpentine

Copyright © J.W. Earnings | Year Posted 2019

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