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Choka Poetry Contest / Nette Onclaud

searching empty rooms ~ what do my tender hopes seek now that I am all moved out ~ ~ mattered - not oblique ~ ~ sadly - whole house seems aloof even walls just feel the roof

Copyright © | Year Posted 2025




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Date: 6/11/2025 7:41:00 AM
Congrats. Seems most entrants went with the pond. I like your take on this prompt.
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Date: 6/11/2025 7:23:00 AM
With those last two lines, you create a mood! Congrats!
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Date: 6/10/2025 10:47:00 PM
So poignant this is. Congrats on the win. I think you may be only winner using this title!
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Date: 6/10/2025 9:24:00 PM
Empty rooms are sodden with memories. They create in us a deep sense of longing, a life we can never relive. once those empty rooms must have been part of our dear youthful life. The sense of aloofness is haunting. Beautifully presented dear Cay Cay.
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CayCay Jennings
Date: 6/10/2025 10:55:00 PM
Based on your words, YOU must have moved a great deal as well or felt those emotions after leaving a longtime home. My life was painted the color of cardboard boxes that I packed almost yearly because my Dad was career military; you feel what I put down and have in many poems, in fact, one is called cardboard boxes. CayCay
Date: 6/8/2025 8:20:00 PM
I can relate to a strange feeling looking at empty rooms of a place you once lives, and not seeing much, kind of expecting to see some meaning, or something to make sense of my experiencet - maybe that's just my feeling your poem evoked in me. There's a movie named Allegro Non Troppo with a vignette that reminds me of (70s movie - lol)
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CayCay Jennings
Date: 6/8/2025 9:37:00 PM
Yes, I thought I'd shared my Army Brat upbringing with you, or that you had read about it in one of my poems. Thank you for coming by. Poetry hugs ... CayCay
Date: 6/8/2025 7:22:00 PM
Dearest CayCay, This Choka captures a deep sense of longing and emptiness. The imagery of "empty rooms" and "walls just feel the roof" evokes a powerful feeling of isolation. Your words convey a poignant sense of loss and yearning. Beautifully written! Best, Anne
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CayCay Jennings
Date: 6/8/2025 7:30:00 PM
Anne, you nailed it. Are you an empath? My Father was in the military; 6 elementary schools, 1 Jr. High, 3 High Schools, 0 high school reunions and so many homes and bedroom walls that I loved. You could tell? Poetry has been my one consistent friend since youth. Wouldn't trade it though, there were upsides. Poetry hugs ... CayCay
Date: 6/8/2025 6:22:00 PM
An amazing, Choka. Full of emotion, could really feel it.
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CayCay Jennings
Date: 6/8/2025 7:34:00 PM
Really is my emotion, Paige. I moved frequently growing up and have an emotionally history with empty houses and unfeeling walls. Thanks for reading, Sweetie ... CayCay
Date: 6/8/2025 9:35:00 AM
I enjoyed reading your wonderful "About This Place" write. Great last line. "Good Luck" We both did this contest. Have a wonderful day writing away..............
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