A Rich Man's Advice

I’ll tell you all a story, about when I was just a lad,
And me Mum and Dad were battling with the little that we had.
Dad was working at Yallourn and would travel there each day, 
On his motorbike and sidecar, just to earn his weekly pay.

On weekends I’d help me father, mowing at the health centre. 
He‘d hand across a couple of bob, and then become my mentor,
“Son don’t you waste this money. Save it for a rainy day!”
And I’d reply “No worries Dad!” Then blow most of it away.

But I had a go at saving, though me balance hardly grew,
With the little interest that I earnt, I’d have to say it’s true,
I’ll end up owing banks galore, ‘cause I’ll have to get a loan,
So I secretly called Grandpa from, the post office telephone. 

You might wonder why I say, I have to make a secret call.
Well Dad and my Mum’s father just don’t get on at all,
For years there’s been a subject, on which my Dad has stewed,
That ended up so vicious and became a family feud.

At first I thought Dad’s jealous, ’cause Grandpa is filthy rich, 
And if he cared about his daughter, at least he ought to pitch,
A couple of quid across to us that would put us on our feet.
But Grandpa said “Keep working hard; and hard times you will beat”. 

I never knew the skeleton that’s hidden, on which my father stewed,
Or the reason what had caused us all, to be in this family feud,
Until Grandpa asked upon the phone, “Come down and visit Son,
Then I’ll explain how I got rich, after being close to skun”.    

Grandpa had it all you know. A Rolls Royce and Mercedes Benz. 
A swimming pool with diving board; of course gold plated pens.  
His house was multi storied and he had some servants too.
I said “Grandpa, I’d like this. How do I get rich like you?”

“Well Son” he said, “It all began way back in thirty three,
When I never had a ‘razoo’, and ‘lo behold’ I found a penny.
And with that penny I invested. I bought an apple from a store.
I shined it for an hour and sold it for tuppence more”.

“And then I took that threepence, and went back to the store
And bought myself three apples, then shined them up some more,
And do you know by that day’s end, my goal I got to reach,
When I sold those apples one by one, and got threepence each”.

“Son I continued buying apples, and my business surely grew,
Six months further down the track, I had ten pound four and two. 
Yes me fortune it grew daily, and then exploded yes it did
When your Grandma’s father died, and left us two million quid”.

©2004 Lindsay Laurie

Copyright © | Year Posted 2015



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Date: 4/7/2015 10:38:00 PM
Loved this well written piece. Ending was a pure delight! I decided long ago not to ever get rich when I saw how much trouble it caused those folks! Most of them worry themselves into an early grave trying not to lose it! Superb writing!! A7
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Laurie Avatar
Lindsay Laurie
Date: 4/22/2015 7:17:00 PM
G'day there Robert... oh so true Robert. As soon as you have money, everybody else wants it. Riches will never make you happy but can make you unhappy. Thanks mate - Lindsay
Date: 4/6/2015 5:15:00 AM
Ya know, with my knowledge and investment savvy---I could turn 2 million quid into a hefty sum ---of about 5 maybe 10------------quid, lol
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Laurie Avatar
Lindsay Laurie
Date: 4/7/2015 8:46:00 PM
G'day Jerry... and you wouldn't be the first one to do that. As long as you had a good time running down your account; that's okay. Regards - Lindsay
Date: 4/5/2015 4:03:00 PM
You nailed a good story here, Lindsay. Didn't see that ending...all's well that ends well, I guess.
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Laurie Avatar
Lindsay Laurie
Date: 4/7/2015 8:44:00 PM
G'day David... thank you for reading and commenting David. Yes, I think apart from winning the lottery, inheriting is the stroke of luck that sets some up for a life of luxury. Catch you soon David - Lindsay
Date: 4/3/2015 12:47:00 PM
You have put a big wide smile on my face, matey - A big old smiley grin! My very best regards, Lindsay!! :) john.
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Laurie Avatar
Lindsay Laurie
Date: 4/3/2015 6:07:00 PM
Hello there John... I'm pleased you got a kick out of this bit of tom foolery, but on the other hand, I dare say you have heard about this stroke of luck occurring somewhere. Catch you soon John - Lindsay
Date: 4/2/2015 9:07:00 AM
I followed a truck some time back with a sign on it suggesting a similar thing. How to get rich -study -work hard -win lotto. Love the message, and enjoyed your witty write. Well done.
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Laurie Avatar
Lindsay Laurie
Date: 4/3/2015 6:04:00 PM
G'day Scott... yes, a few years back there were witty signs on trucks that cleaned out septic tanks. Thanks for reading and commenting Scott - Lindsay
Date: 3/27/2015 10:02:00 PM
Hello Lindsay, Very well written, enjoyed the story & the twist at the end. It is nice to have the ability to be able to entertain. Kind regards---John
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Date: 3/27/2015 7:43:00 PM
I do love your humour Laurie - fabulous write from start to finish:-) Hugs Jan xx 7 xx
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