A Moment In Time Pt.1

A MOMENT IN TIME Many people miss the chance to discover the truth about things in their life. Then you have those people that are born with the truth about their life, and then there are people like me who at one point and time knew the truth and chose to stay away from it. Now as I look back, what a stupid move on my part, and not to mention the lives I ruined with that choice. I made a choice to be selfish and misguiding, leading to a lot of broken hearts and empty promises. I guess you really never know what’s going until it is to late and the mistakes have already been made. “What a life?”, is what I used to ask myself, “What are you doing?”, was another popular one. Sometimes I didn’t know where I was going or where I was at, lost in a world of my own, with no concern for anyone else. Growing up took a lot, a lot of focus and determination, and that also came with a lot of pain and sorrow. Realizing the truth about myself again took a lot out of me, and it might of crippled me, if I wasn’t so strong. But then the question arises in my mind, was I really that strong, if I ran for so long? Changing everything in my life to see what would work, but nothing would work, because I wouldn’t let it work. The first stage of being selfish has now been complete. So where do we go from here? Learning how to fake the truth is where I went. Time after time I lied to myself to make me feel better about what I was doing. But did I ever stop to think of the people in my life that would be affected by this move. Becoming stand offish, was one move, being totally engaged with myself with no care or no worries, but little did I know that I was ruining my own life as I lived it. I used to love to disguise my soul and mind just to fit where I was at. I was very quick thinking on my feet, no matter where I went I could mold into whatever they wanted me to be. Almost like wearing a cloak, and I was good at it, but for those people that thought they knew me really got the worst end on the stick. There would be times where I would snap and fight friends and they wouldn’t even know why I would and I would never explain it either. The second stage of being selfish is now complete.