A Lil Depressed

SITIING HERE IN THIS LIFE OF SIN, NOT KNOWING WHETHER TO CRY OR GRIN. SEEN SO MUCH IN MY SHORT LIFE, ALREADY AT TWENTY SIX SOMEONE'S WIFE. I'VE SEEN DEATH STARING IN MY FACE, WONDERING WHY IN THE HELL WAS I EVER BROUGHT INTO THIS PLACE. I'VE BEEN THRU ALOT OF HEARTACHE AND PAIN, DRIVING ME TO SNORT COCAINE. IT WAS EASIER TO TAKE DRUG'S AND DRINK, MY MIND SO MESSED UP I COULDNT EVEN THINK. LOOKING AT ME U'D NEVER SEE THE DISTRUST I HAVE, U WOULDNT BELIEVE EVERYNIGHT I SIT ALONE HELLA SAD. I TRY AND BE STRONG FOR THE PEOPLE I LOVE, PRAYING EVERYNIGHT TO THE MAN ABOVE. PLEASE HELP ME GET BETTER AND NOT FEEL THIS WAY, PLEASE BLESS ME WITH THE COURAGE AND STRENGTH FOR ONE MORE DAY. I'VE TAKEN BLADES TO MY WRIST, IT TAKES MY FEELINGS AWAY FROM BEING PISSED. I'VE HAD FRIENDS WHO DIDNT UNDERSTAND, THEY SAY THERE PROBLEMS WERE MUCH MORE GRAND. TREATING ME LIKE A FAILURE TO WORLD OUT THERE, ALL DOPED UP I SIT THE WALL I STARE. I DONT CARE ANYMORE IF U TURN UR BACK, WHEN UR WALKING AWAY JUST DONT LOOK BACK....