A Life Journey

There was a time in my life when I was Self-assured and I experienced the Esteem of my fellow man. I could walk into a roomful of strangers and have no qualms about the dangers of a slip of the tongue, as I knew I would have a quick and witty repartee for them. Of course, that time in my life passed all too quickly, as I grew older and "full of wisdom" taught by life's experiences. The self-assurance I had when I was 18, transformed into a more cautious, yet still estimable 25. Taking what I knew to be the deceitful practices of unscrupulous and dishonest men, I reassessed my own life in terms of its self-assurance and esteem. I found that I it was more difficult to be sure of myself in every situation; that because of the pain I had to endure at their hands I would now look at my life through the ever emptying glass of self-worth, prestige, and know-it-all attitude. I had to find my guide, again. Others now pointed out the foibles that were inherent in my character. I took note of these observations, only to find that too many of them were true. However, I also began to realize that in order for me to again regain the esteem of the person I saw each morning in the mirror, I had to better follow my original mission statement of life ~ TO HELP PEOPLE. I began this mission in earnest by careful assessment of the past mistakes I had made in judgment, my personal sins of commission and omission, and a renewed faith in God's mercy. It has been a struggle for over 30 years now, and I have a renewed Esteem and Self-assurance because of my belief in Him. Of the gifts He gave to me in that time of searching, the most important and influential were a new wife and family, their love and affection, and the ability and confidence to write words like these for you to read. Now, I can again enter that room of strangers and have the ability to speak to them without the doubts that have plagued me for these many years. I owe it to the Lord above, thank Him for His generosity to me, and pray that you will also know His Loving Will in your life. VIVAT JESUS!