A Jar of Mustard and Ketchup Too
Yes you are lacking in basic culinary skills
your cooking is wanting for a flavor thrill
And heaven knows you'll never make a savory dish
so close your eyes and use the chefs last wish
Food too plain and bland what do you do
get that jar of mustard and ketchup too
Don't be shy tastebuds counting on you
open that jar of mustard and ketchup too
Slather it, smear it, pour it on strong
the more you use the less it taste wrong
The vigor of mustard on your tongue
that sweetness of ketchup sings a song
Disguise that flavorless gunk on your plate
pile high those condiments for goodness sake
Make it bearable and a eatable chow
with sky high food prices can't be wasteful now
So be grateful and thankful that you are able to chew
your mediocre insipid rather mild boring cooked food
By simply adding to the table what you must do
a jar of mustard and ketchup too.
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