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The Hitch

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Originally published: 29th March 2023

Image by OpenClipart Vectors from Pixabay


- A homage to Hitchcock (Several of his films are referenced by name) and Nic Roeg (The film director who often experimented with time, place and person.)


Pt. I
The Lodger Morning sneaked inside the flat and lit the dusty air through holes in the torn curtains forming spotlights on the floor. He woke from the discomfort of a night in his armchair and sighed at all the empty cans he'd finished hours before. The window to the rear looked down onto the bookshop's yard - a cold and ugly concrete space with a wall some six feet high. The window to the front looked down onto a boulevard and from that room above the shop he watched the world go by. He glanced towards the old church clock inside the tall bell tower then synched his watch just as it struck and chimed at 8am. On cue the birds took to the sky exactly on the hour - their frenzied screeches stopping as they came to rest again. A man wearing a bowler hat of the type Churchill once wore seemed angry with a woman who was sitting at her stand. He was reaching out towards her when the woman stood and swore then he turned and walked away without a paper in his hand. When a stranger at the bus stop jumped on board the '39' and sat down on a seat just as the driver closed the door People who'd been queueing stood confused outside in line - and spellbound by the fact they'd never seen that bus before. Inside the room above the shop the lodger from his chair concluded that the fallout from his actions had begun. Now everything he'd seen outside brought with it dark despair "Oh God!" he whispered to himself "what have I gone and done?"
Pt. II
The Bus Driver He smiled at all his colleagues at the busy main depot then climbed behind the wheel and drove his bus out right on time. He’d memorized the new route he’d been told he had to go ..then changed the number of the bus to number '39'. The Bowler Hatted Man His every weekday was the same - he'd wake then feed his cat and be ready after breakfast for his walk to the town hall. He would always wear a dark suit with his trademark bowler hat and pass behind the bookshop with its yard and six foot wall. The Newspaper Seller She was there pre 730 selling papers from her stand smiling as she made a sale while talking on her phone. She struggled serving people giving change with just one hand speaking to her pregnant daughter ill and home alone. The Lodger He glanced towards the old church clock inside the tall bell tower then synched his watch just as it struck and chimed at 8am. But as he’d had a change of heart before that vital hour he knew then that his life would never be the same again. The Wrong Man Because he lived life on the edge and worked and played so hard to him his crimes brought with them very little risk and fuss. He used his speed to get away fast down the boulevard then pushed in line and jumped on board the passengerless bus.
Pt. III
The Bowler Hatted Man He was ready after breakfast for his walk to the town hall - you could set your watch by knowing where he’d be at any time. He always walked the same route past the bookshop's yard and wall in a town that was experiencing a spike in violent crime. The Bus Driver His pregnant wife tried stopping him from working on that day she was crying, ill and didn't want to be at home alone. Her husband had been acting in an odd, peculiar way after getting a strange phone call on the night before at home. The Wrong Man He boasted he committed crimes "Well, just because I can" and was ready with his sharpened blade he dubbed his calling card. He jumped out on the scared and startled bowler hatted man at the back of the town's bookshop near its wall and concrete yard. Because he lived life on the edge and still craved so much more his crimes to him were worth the risk the hassle and the fuss. He used his speed to get away like many times before then saw his chance to jump on board a '39' town bus. The Newspaper Seller The bowler hatted man approached and snatched her phone somehow "I'm talking to my daughter - Give it back!" she screamed and cursed "...But I've just been robbed and badly cut so need your phone right NOW".. - she grabbed it back while shouting: "sort your budget cuts out first!" The Lodger This conscientious hitman wished to turn his life around - he'd been paid to shoot his target when the birds took to the sky. Their screeching would have drowned the firing of the bullet sound but instead he'd let 'the bowler hatted man' walk briskly by. He didn't therefore leave the flat together with the gun and step on board the ‘39’ (he watched now from his chair) But he sensed the driver had assumed the 'hit' was said and done as he drove off with some guy on board to meet The Firm somewhere.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2022




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Date: 4/6/2024 3:58:00 AM
i really like how you've done this (i always like your writing), the way you've pulled it all together, i can see a lot of work and thought went into it..it's a complex and clever write - bowler hats off to you! lol
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Gary Radice
Date: 4/6/2024 7:17:00 AM
Thanks Charlotte If there is one poem of mine that gave me two continuous sleepless nights and a massive headache it is this one. It didn't really fit Tom's contest but I pushed it just to give it an airing..before putting it back in that poetic drawer labelled WTF :) Cheers - Gary
Date: 4/1/2024 6:26:00 PM
This was an interesting read Gary. The format threw me off a bit but it has some fascinating aspects to it. Thx for supporting the contest
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Tom Woody
Date: 4/5/2024 7:41:00 PM
Haha yes walkabout. Charlotte's a gem
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Gary Radice
Date: 4/5/2024 1:27:00 PM
Tom is it Walkabout? If it is I commented on it when she wrote it. If it's another, then I need to check it out. What the heck? I'm going for a re read anyway. :) Cheers - Gary
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Tom Woody
Date: 4/2/2024 6:08:00 AM
You should read Charlotte Puddifoot entry. She's also a fan of that director and based hers on one of his movies
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Gary Radice
Date: 4/1/2024 9:51:00 PM
You probably felt like you'd been through The Twilight Zone by the time you had read it all Tom LOL! Thanks for having the stamina. Cheers - Gary
Date: 1/4/2024 7:36:00 AM
I enjoyed reading this creative long write. As a rule I don't read long ones but enjoyed this... Glad Silent One did this. Have a creative day writing away........................
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Gary Radice
Date: 1/4/2024 8:29:00 AM
Thank you Paula. I'm so glad you made it to the end. I'm betting many don't. :) Cheers - Gary
Date: 1/3/2024 12:01:00 PM
This is brilliant storytelling and one of the longest poems I have read for a while.. Maybe that was why it did not place in a contest before hand.. This wasn't really a contest, but an opportunity to showcase an Na poem..
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Gary Radice
Date: 1/3/2024 12:38:00 PM
Thanks SO. I appreciate the chance to air this again. It is actually a personal favourite of mine but, I agree, longer works do tend to put readers off. Thanks for sticking it out ubtil the end. Cheers - Gary
Date: 10/4/2022 4:34:00 PM
I was riveted to the end, Gary: Life is full of chance. Just leaving home 5 mins. later than planned can change everything. I wrote a poem about 911 with that kind of theme. Really enjoyed this. SuZ
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Suzanne Delaney
Date: 10/5/2022 6:05:00 AM
Ha ha, Gary: Fun to stretch the imagination at times even if the hairline suffers. SuZ
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Gary Radice
Date: 10/5/2022 5:35:00 AM
I have to thank you for having the stamina to read this SuZ and I'm so glad you enjoyed it. I liked the idea and challenge of exploring cutting and pasting a story and then attempting to bring it all together under one timeline so as to speak. Suffice to say it had me waking up at all hours to jot ideas down but thankfully I got to the end. Yes, life is full of chance and what ifs? What if I hadn't written this?..well, I'd still have the hair I pulled out trying to write the thing. :) Cheers - Gary
Date: 9/10/2022 10:45:00 PM
Another tour de force narrative poem (I would even call it 'epic'), Gary. Love the title and the interweaving characters and plot intrigue you have woven together into this tapestry of mystery, murder, mistaken identities, and intrigue. I have seen around a dozen Hitchcock movies (my favorites are North By Northwest, The Rear Window, and Vertigo, which your tall bell tower reminded me of) but now that I have read this, I am inclined to pull out my boxed set and watch several more. As always, your rhymes and rhythms are impeccable and make for an easy flowing read... length is not an issue when one writes as well as you do. Thanks for the tip to read this, my friend ~ John
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Gary Radice
Date: 9/11/2022 4:17:00 AM
Hi John. Rear Window has to be my favourite; I love the 'claustrophobia' of the whole set. The film was the main driving force behind this narrative. Have a great weekend John. Cheers - Gary
Date: 4/21/2022 4:10:00 AM
What an interesting narrative, Gary! I love it more so when it rhymes:) absolutely brilliant work:)
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Gary Radice
Date: 4/21/2022 9:40:00 AM
Thanks Jo! Your comments are very much appreciated. For all the Hitcock aficionados out there, his films referenced (mainly in name only) are: The Lodger, Torn Curtain, Rear Window, The Birds, Frenzy, The Wrong Man, The 39 Steps and Spellbound. I guess it's possible the guy in the bowler hat may - or may not - be Hitchcock. :) Cheers - Gary
Date: 4/4/2022 4:37:00 AM
Creative story told in poetic form. It was inviting and alluring all the way to the end. Thanks for the visit to my page. Sara
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Gary Radice
Date: 4/7/2022 3:12:00 PM
Hi Sara. Thanks so much for your valued comments. Cheers - Gary
Date: 3/29/2022 9:00:00 AM
From beginning to end, I was mesmerized, Gary, and not a little envious of your stellar ability to sustain interest through a piece of work this long and intricate. Loved the way you pulled it off. You are a genius, my friend. Do another one! I never pass up a Gary Radice!
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Gary Radice
Date: 3/29/2022 9:51:00 AM
Thank you Milt for your kind words and encouragement. I do enjoy writing narrative poems and this is a particular favourite of mine. I spent much of the time cutting and pasting the story and putting the pieces together like a jigsaw so at least there was some semblance of order...hopefully it all makes sense. :) Thanks again. Cheers - Gary
Date: 3/29/2022 3:47:00 AM
Very unique. Thanks for posting all as one. I really like the switch back and forth to different characters as the story unfolds.
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Gary Radice
Date: 3/29/2022 4:12:00 AM
Thanks Jeff. It's always a gamble posting a longer poem but because I felt that all 3 of the original separate parts would be better read together as one piece I'm really thankful and grateful to you for sticking with it to the end and for your comments :) Cheers - Gary

Book: Reflection on the Important Things