A Hand Upon Her Cheek
Before I collapse from overdosing on apathy
before I become empty from losing my lunch
shed my snake skin and become a venomous reptilian again
I write my final innocent words before I replace them with malice
I hold back my rage for there's just tears for the moment
I'm afraid this is the temporary end of me
The boy telling this story will vanish once the last word is written
These thoughts, my cancer
these questions are the tumors
that Friday night, a mystery; why do you haunt me so
Why wasn't I there to see the scene unfold
instead of hearing news I never saw
wish I never heard, wish I never...
The grief resting upon my face is an open book, easily frayed and read
but the next page, coated in red, please careful, don't rip the edge
for it signals change and I, by my history, cannot handle it
The blame, the fault: does it rest within me
or can I point my favorite finger at the culprit
Who can I curse with the heaviest tone
for turning my heart of gold into weighted stone
Who do I turn to, to bury my fist and foot in
to rid myself of feeling sick, feeling lost, feeling angry
What do I do when it seems everyone hates me
when I'm haunted by a night I wasn't present for
Who do I blame for the bad news
Who do I hit, myself or the culprit
that placed a hand upon her cheek
as her hand decided to drift
drift from sight to a little lower
Do I know for sure
ask the question to empty air
and that's the answer I know...
but it all happened beyond doors I couldn't see
it all happened beyond doors I couldn't reach from my room
The woman, well girl at the time I called mine
then thought was love at first sight
was terror at first fight, first bite
she showed me the meaning of bite
when her venom injected me till I curled on the floor, sobbing
while I got the call saying...
well ask her, I'm sorry it's too painful to finish
my memory hazy, apologies for feeling lazy
OK, she betrayed me
it all starting at night, I far away from her
as she met an old flame
the story from here is the same
It all started with a hand upon her cheek...
Copyright © Andrus Cassian | Year Posted 2016
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