A Futuristic Christmas- For Contest

Twenty fifth of December, three thousand and four
and already I'm down in the dumps
we're round at the neighbour's via tubes that save labour
propelled by some hydraulic pumps.
We've exchanged all our presents and got them unwrapped
once again I've got self-cleaning socks
the wife's Kevlar panties, though they are quite scanty
are going straight back in the box.
I'm constantly goaded to eat nuts they've downloaded
they'll try any tactic to feed ya
but the problem, I quibble is that some have been nibbled
as they're passed around on social media.
We're looking for doorways or just any more ways
to find a quick route to get out
and escape if we're able, being chased round the table
by genetically modified sprouts.
They've offered a glass of Martian Pinot noir
and they tell me it's alcohol free
so there goes my boozing and afternoon snoozing
and waking up just after tea.
Grandma kids are teasing, cryogenic freezing
means she won't wake up until noon
to find grapes in her hair and a plum, God knows where
and they've blocked up her nose with some spoons.
Don't know why they have bothered with plates that can hover
it seems so bone idle to me
they could have just handed the pudding that's landed
on the light fitting just above me.
The custard's abundant but the jug is redundant
administered now by syringe
and so is the Brandy which, though is quite handy
prevents us from having a binge.
When later we get back from fresh air and jet packs
remembering when we could walk
I'll look back fondly then to those Christmases when
we just used a knife and a fork.

November 16th 2015
For Contest 'A futuristic Christmas', sponsor Mystic Rose
Copyright © | Year Posted 2015

Poem

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Fraser Avatar
December 31, 2015 at 12:32 PM
Wow, what a koolio Futuristic Christmas journey you've taken the reader on Viv, love it. Most deserved to be honoured ~~ James :)
Wigley Avatar
December 31, 2015 at 10:22 PM
Thanks, James, all the best to you both. Regards, Viv
A   Avatar
December 28, 2015 at 11:18 PM
WONDERFUL WIN
Wigley Avatar
December 29, 2015 at 12:35 AM
Thanks, Linda, have a wonderful New year. Viv x
A  Avatar
December 28, 2015 at 10:24 PM
Viv, a very nice win. SKAT
Wigley Avatar
December 29, 2015 at 12:35 AM
Thanks, Skat, all the best to you and yours for 2016, Viv x
A. Sharma Avatar
December 28, 2015 at 1:46 AM
Great take on the theme and a wonderful poetry Viv.. congrats on big win! I just missed this contest!!
Wigley Avatar
December 28, 2015 at 2:05 AM
Thanks, Dr Upma, I know the feeling when a competition closes just when you're ready to submit- it's a shame we can't book a seat... All the best for the New year, Viv x
Delaney Avatar
December 28, 2015 at 1:39 AM
Congratulations ViV:'I knew this was a high winner. It flows so easily and with such natural humor. I have it on my favs list, and I seven-ed it. Thanks for your emails ...I am suffering ith a shingles attack,,,, what a Christmas present. Thanks Santa- NOT. Cyber hugs, SuZ
Delaney Avatar
December 28, 2015 at 7:20 PM
Thanks for your kindness, ViV. I commented to Laurie. L that I got Shingles for Christmas and re-iterated before he could, that they were not roofing shingles LOL SuZ
Wigley Avatar
December 28, 2015 at 2:06 AM
Thanks, Suz, and I'm honoured that my poem has been 'Delaneyed'. Sorry to hear that your year of ills has been topped off in such fashion- here's hoping that 2016 will be kinder for you. Viv x
Tor Avatar
December 28, 2015 at 12:37 AM
Viv congratulations on a 1st place win. Very funny enjoyed reading very much!
Wigley Avatar
December 28, 2015 at 12:56 AM
Thanks, Michael, glad I could raise a smile. Regards, Viv
Roper Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 7:42 PM
Viv, congratulations on your win!!! Hugs Eve
Wigley Avatar
December 28, 2015 at 12:57 AM
Big hug back, Eve x
Haight Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 7:28 PM
Wow, Viv! So happy I am living in the now! Quite imaginative and clever! Congrats on your First Place win. Sandra
Wigley Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 7:36 PM
Thanks, fellow topster, you too. Viv x
Wigley Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 7:21 PM
Congratulations, me, and i hope I have a very happy New year. Regards, Me x
Wigley Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 7:26 PM
Thanks, me, appreciate your comment, and I hope I have a great new year too. Regards, Me .
Callus Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 2:28 PM
Humour comes natural to you, my friend! Truly enjoyed this creative offering. ~ Congratulations on placing first! ~ Regards // paul
Wigley Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 7:22 PM
Thanks, Paul, I think I'd had a beer or two when I thought this one up. Good fun. A very happy New year to you and yours. Regards, Viv
Gentry Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 2:10 PM
This is awesome! Very clever, funny, well-written. I love it!
Wigley Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 7:22 PM
Thanks, Susan, glad you enjoyed it. Have a great New year! Viv x
Scars Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 2:01 PM
Very clever and creative Viv! Congrats on your 1st place win! -luloo *congrats* *smiles*
Wigley Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 7:23 PM
Thanks, fellow topster, and a Happy new year to you, Laura, Viv x
Allison Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 1:38 PM
a real futuristic write Mr Viv congrats on your win:-) hugs Jan xx
Allison Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 7:25 PM
And for you and your family Mr Viv:-) hugs Jan xx
Wigley Avatar
December 27, 2015 at 7:23 PM
Thanks, Jan, here's hoping for a much much better 2016 for you and Bob. Viv x
A  Avatar
November 20, 2015 at 2:53 AM
Viv, Excellent poem. Thank you for sharing. **SKAT**
Wigley Avatar
November 23, 2015 at 1:42 AM
Thanks Skat, hope you're well. Viv x
Delaney Avatar
November 19, 2015 at 5:57 PM
ViV. This is very imaginative.....I wonder if Santa is going to still have reindeers or robots.lol Will have to check out this Contest..it sounds a real hoot. SuZ
Wigley Avatar
November 20, 2015 at 12:22 AM
Give it a go, Suz, I'm sure you'll do well. Viv x
Hunjeri Avatar
November 18, 2015 at 2:58 PM
Hey Viv, how did u come up with this..?...i wonder. sounds like a very sad time in the futuristic Christmas. i hope we don't become that way. i prefer the knife and fork too.
Wigley Avatar
November 20, 2015 at 12:22 AM
Or even better, njeri, eat with your fingers. Apart from the gravy. Viv x
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