Home » Poems » Tom Cunningham » A Bit of Black Friday Humour

Tom Cunningham | + Follow Poet |

A Bit of Black Friday Humour

Poet's Notes

(Show)

Become a Premium Member and post notes and photos about your poem like Tom Cunningham.

Image credit - Missiontosave.com

RUDOLPHS DEMISE Rudolf reindeer lost his sight in one eye Santa said you won't be able to fly Also said you're getting old To a butcher he was sold He ended up as red nose reindeer pie... SPEEDING SANTA A speed trap was set up on the highway Cops waited for a mug to come their way A speeder appeared Sporting a white beard They handcuffed him and impounded his sleigh... 'DIRTY' SANTA An elf debts just wouldn't go away To raise money he stole Santa's sleigh The bad elf went on the run Santa shot him with his gun Saying " go ahead punk make my day"... POOR POLLY The family were waiting to be fed But the turkey had rotted and smelt dead They were in a rut The shops were all shut So they roasted their pet parrot instead... THE GRINCH Someone stole presents from under the tree Cops were baffled and thought who can it be ? The culprit was seen Twas a man in green The Grinch caught as he attempted to flee... ELVES REVENGE The elves downed tools cos they wanted more pay Santa said" you get enough so no way I dont need you no more Can get toys from the store " They got their revenge and burned down his sleigh ... EYE EYE A man ordered for dessert pumkin pie Was choking stomach thrusts' they did apply Started to heave Made other guests leave Chef rushed over, said " you found my glass eye"... Written 30th November 2019.

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Connie Marcum Wong

Date: 12/12/2019 11:20:00 PM

These are absolutely hysterical Tom. I laugh so hard I have tears in my eyes. Thank you for the humor and Mele Kalikimaka! : ) xxoo I just Faved these!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/13/2019 1:36:00 AM

Thank you very much Connie, I'm happy you enjoyed them, thanks too for the fave. Happy holidays to you and your family. Tom

Gershon Wolf

Date: 12/6/2019 12:14:00 PM

'Red-nosed reindeer pie...roasted parrot...Glass eye pumpkin pie Tom, you are the 'Gourmet Holiday Poet!! So enjoyable are these lims. Thanks!! :) gw

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/6/2019 4:30:00 PM

Thank you Gershon, must say I've lost my appetite lol. Tom

Caren Krutsinger

Date: 12/5/2019 6:10:00 AM

What a fun way to begin the holiday season, Tom. Amazingly fun!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/5/2019 6:43:00 AM

Thank you Caren, happy you enjoyed them. Tom

Charles Messina

Date: 12/2/2019 9:44:00 PM

Great fun for the holidays, Tom. Love the Rudolph one the best. Tom Thumb might have drank rum, when he pulled out an antler...instead of a plum. lol Have a nice evening. Charlie

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/3/2019 3:41:00 AM

Haha Love your comment. Hope you're well. Tom

Timothy Mcguire

Date: 12/2/2019 6:40:00 PM

Yikes! Funny, love those limericks!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/3/2019 3:40:00 AM

Thanks Timothy, working on.the next batch. Tom

Jennifer Proxenos

Date: 12/2/2019 7:22:00 AM

Hi Tom, Around Johannesburg it made it a 'Black 5 day" but of course everything was becoming cheaper with every day passing. Great set of Limericks as usual.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/2/2019 7:34:00 AM

Thank you Jennifer, glad you liked them. Tom

Tania Kitchin

Date: 12/1/2019 4:58:00 AM

These gave me a laugh Tom, very entertaining!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/1/2019 5:01:00 AM

Thank you very much Tania, happy you enjoyed them. Tom

Demetrios Trifiatis

Date: 12/1/2019 4:53:00 AM

...and the Oscar of Limericks goes to...my dear friend, TOM Cunningham! I enjoyed every single limerick dear Tom! Hohoho!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/1/2019 4:59:00 AM

Thank you very much Demetrios, and for the Oscar, better prepare a speech lol. Tom

Lindsay Laurie

Date: 11/30/2019 6:48:00 PM

G'day Tom ... I've gotta say Tom. You gave me a spirited laugh this morning - thank you Tom - Lindsay

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/1/2019 4:17:00 AM

Thank you Lindsay, happy I gave you a laugh. Tom

Anne-Lise Andresen

Date: 11/30/2019 2:55:00 PM

... :))) ... as always a pleasure to read, Tom :) - hugs and happy weekend // Anne-Lise :)

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/1/2019 4:16:00 AM

Thanks Anne , and to you too.tom

Na Na

Date: 11/29/2019 7:30:00 PM

Hi Tom all these were great. Thanks for sharing them. Put a smile and a chuckle on my face, some of them made my little heart race, started with a demise, ended with glass eye pies, Congrats from me, you have some good taste. :)

Na Na
Date: 12/1/2019 12:09:00 PM

didnt know if you noticed I commented with a Limerick lol.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/30/2019 3:07:00 AM

Thanks very much Gregory, happy you enjoyed them, enjoy your weekend. Tom

Ann Foster

Date: 11/29/2019 4:34:00 PM

hahahah... Ann

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/29/2019 4:56:00 PM

Thanks Ann, glad you got a laugh out of them. Hope you enjoyed your day. Tom

Eve Roper

Date: 11/29/2019 3:34:00 PM

haha Is made my day.. I got a little laugh of my boring day after eating so much turkey dinner. :)

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/29/2019 3:53:00 PM

Thanks very much Eve, happy I gave you a laugh.I wish we could adopt Thanksgiving, have to wait till Christmas for my. Turkey dinner. Tom

Heidi Sands

Date: 11/29/2019 2:09:00 PM

Creatively written for sure Tom! You can write these so well :) Let's hope Santa, Rudolph and the Elves do ok this year! :)

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/29/2019 3:51:00 PM

Thank you Heidi, I'm sure they will. Tom

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 11/29/2019 1:38:00 PM

haha, you had many good ones among this set of holiday limericks.WELL DONE

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/29/2019 1:57:00 PM

Thank you Andrea, happy you enjoyed them, hope youre enjoying the holidays. Tom

Sandra Adams

Date: 11/29/2019 10:41:00 AM

these. like all your other limericks were comical Tom, thank you so much for the laughs today... holiday's are always stressful so the humor is welcomed... hugs :)

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/29/2019 10:43:00 AM

Thank you Sandra, happy you enjoyed the humour. Hope you had a lovely day yesterday. Tom

Kim Rodrigues

Date: 11/29/2019 7:49:00 AM

LOL...Red nose reindeer pie! The sad thing’s i could see someone trying to steal the sleigh. Eye eye is funny funny!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/29/2019 8:16:00 AM

Haha, glad you enjoyed Kim, next time I eat out I'll double check hard bits lol. Tom

Vijay Pandit

Date: 11/29/2019 7:32:00 AM

Fantastic Tom--great humor--each one uniquely hilarious--This deserves a poem of the day.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 11/29/2019 8:14:00 AM

Thanks very much Vijay, glad you enjoyed them Tom.