~ (~) ~ Answering Hate (Part #4 of 5) ~ (~) ~

I searched for Him inside my heart through my experiences. That I have always known without Him. And He is still healing me today just as the message states in the very message contained in the Bible and in the one that was written and offered to you and all here that made you feel the way that you said. Yes I know that it seemed hurtful, but I still feel for myself today, it was not truly hateful. It was just how it was offered to me, and sometimes it appeared to me the same way back then as well, as hateful. I believe that in both ways God was loving me. Because the more I keep searching within myself for the truth of my own hate and all their many forms. His ways of loving me I am finding are far far more! I ran to my idea of Him that I believe we all were given within. I ran to God through His promise of peace with Him and ourselves and one another an the world around us through Jesus. I'm truly sorry to have hurt you through this. I hope the other part of this two sided message will help you. I hope it will. I know it has with me. Happy Hanuka friend and again I am sorry. To help another find out the same thing that I am still coming to find out myself a little more of today and every day, was my intention. Because my only ambition truly as I fight within myself with the pains that I have caused everyone that I have known, by living this way, I'm-truly-sorry. I was only trying to help. Peace be with you friend and come to bless you, and carry you through the pain and keep you. And so as honestly as I can I am offering this prayer and hoping this as well for you. That if when you find that you cannot stop yourself from being this way too, and are able to see it as honestly as this for what it is. You would be open to Him and would be hopeful, and even more eager in your need for this, and would be willing and be able to come to accept Him in His greater love. As I feel and am finding out more of today myself that He is always open to all of us. As I am still eager and willing to find out about more of Him and about the even more broader idea of this today in all of it's certain ramifications. He is still open as I feel He is always willing in His simple offering of this. And as we all are I feel as well growing away from Him in this way from time to time. I feel He is just as much in His way offering His greater love like this for all of us... . http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=keIvA2wSPZc&feature=related