3rd Child
My story is quite simple
My husband and I had been faithfully
Correctly using birth control for almost 13 years
We’d forgotten it only once
Resulting in the birth of our second child in 2005
However, in spite of proper use
Birth control failed again in 2015
After learning I was pregnant for the 3rd time
My husband and I sat down to discuss our options
What a new child would mean for our family
Money was tight, our marriage was struggling, and at nearly 40
I didn’t feel that I could handle another pregnancy and childbirth
At the end of our discussion
My husband said,
“We’ve never considered this before, but do you want this child?”
I replied simply, “No.”
He said he didn’t either, but that he’d support any decision I made.
At the end of our discussion
Even though it was his child
He recognized that the decision was ultimately mine
Living in Nevada, we didn’t have to deal with unreasonable restrictions
There were no protesters to meet us at the clinic
The only obstacle we faced
No providers in the area took my insurance
We had to pay the $500 out of pocket
I made the appointment for that Thursday
So that I wouldn’t miss any work
Less than a week after discovering I was pregnant
At the clinic
I received a trans-l ultrasound to verify how far along I was: 4 weeks.
The blastocyst was about the size of a sesame seed
Exactly what it looked like
At such an early stage
A medical abortion was my only option
I took the first pill at the clinic
Was told most women don’t start bleeding heavily
Until after taking the second pill the next day
I’m not most women
Started bleeding heavily enough
I had to leave work early Friday
The pain didn’t start until after I took the second pill
It hurt, but was no worse than cramps amplified by food poisoning
I was glad for the pain medication the doctor had prescribed me
Then, it was over
I bled for about 3 weeks and then everything returned to normal.
I admit some initial doubt that we were making the correct decision
Was willing to accept that doubt
After about a year, that doubt has disappeared
During the process
I didn’t feel alone because my husband was right there with me
Copyright © Jacqueline R. Mendoza | Year Posted 2020
Post Comments
Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.
Please
Login
to post a comment